I'm actually boring myself

About a week or so ago, Google changed the way you can access images in search. For years I've been able to get to cached image storage after websites went private or even deleted. That button is gone now. Sourcing images back to original original source technically no longer exists. This might seem irrelevant to some, but it's actually huge in a world of restricting access. It's not that big of a deal for me, since I mostly play with memes (and I try to give credit with link backs whenever possible), but for some people this means no longer being able to source original news photos that have gone viral. Something to think about.

Youtube opinion accounts are being shut down this last week, whether they are monetized or not, and at least one person has been interviewed by a major television news network citing the algorithm fallout already affecting his real life business so badly that he lost it. That was fast. Was I the only one to notice how fast that was? Anyway, the U.S. is being virtually cut off from search fields across medias, not out of malice, but out of opportunity. Hands are being tied as the FCC and internet regulations are allowing much bigger hands to insist on removing what gets in their ways. Facebook has been restricting feeds and posting capabilities for a couple of months, judging by the complaints I've seen, twitter went on a bot purge cleaning house (I wonder why they only picked Russian bots, because I'm really tired of purging the spam and porn and automated vitriol from the rest of the world, as well), and as accounts shift to new hosts hoping to survive, the web is shifting like a ship on a scary ocean. Well, at least for Americans. Funny thing is, I don't think most people are noticing. Unless you are following live news broadcasts and live feeds and noticing some things are literally being scrubbed back off the internet within the hour, you really have no idea. I've been on the webs since 1994 and have never seen anything like it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That was last night. This is today.


I think I'm getting my life back. I coughed myself into a what feels like a neck sprain through all that flu and cold virus stuff back to back, and I made an appointment for next week to talk to someone about checking on possible herniated incision since it's still so soon after gallbladder removal (a little over 3 months, but 18-24 months for complete healing and incisions always remain weak spots), but that's what coughing does, right, it wrecks you up and makes you miserable and then it's such a relief when it's over. Hopefully it's just an acute fibro of the abdomen flare, and that's actually a real thing and sucks a bit.

• From Fibromyalgia and You- "It is a systemic disease that mainly affects the muscles, their attachments (tendons, ligaments) and coverings (fascia). Fibromyalgia may be considered as soft tissue rheumatism. Fibromyalgia may also affect many other parts of the body, including the stomach, bowels and female organs."

I am noticing, though, that even having only 2 contacts with anyone for any kind of hands on physical therapy since before Christmas, my pain levels are significantly lower and much more tolerable (a really nice side effect is my general anxiety being at an all time low), and I really think that's because removing the diseased/infected gallbladder was such a relief to my entire body that many systems are going back to a normal I wasn't aware could exist. Just living with that amount of localized inflammation must've taxed my poor body 24 hours a day for months and months, and now just having that gone is making a whole lot of difference how the rest of my challenges are able to be internally addressed. Even when I should probably think I'm feeling kind of miserable, I feel so much better than I used to. I still can't believe I breezed through the actual influenza B. Really hope the A misses me. There are people around the area who've tested positive for both at the same time, plus we had at least 2 separate cold/crud viruses circulating, as well. Got pretty crazy.

I feel like this is my most boring post ever, so I may as well share that my house is a wreck and I don't care because I finally got to sit and watch TV, and it felt gooooood. I almost never see much TV any more. I thought they did a nice episode with Carl, although it felt like Negan should've been interrupting them any second, so I was way more jumpy and anxious than I usually am watching Walking Dead. And then tonight I sat through Revenge of the Sith on TV even though I own it, and used the commercial breaks to get supper put away and coffee ready for tomorrow and my pajamas on and stuff like that. Bunny and her mama have been feeling so much better enough to run around with friends again, so it's been a bit blissful just being able to sit around and let my mind go blank.

Ok, now I'm super blank, so I'm going to bed.

check your self assessments at the door

I've talked about google masking, and some of you have become so brilliant with it that you think you're completely invisible. Well... these are how other bloggers handle incoming.

JUST BECAUSE…YOU HAVE TO PROTECT YOURSELF {TUTORIAL}

HOW I TRACK THE IP ADDRESSES OF MY ANONS

I've had a steady flow of hourly/daily/weekly traffic for years. It's easy to misunderstand trackers and mistake a friend lurking for a weirdo stalker, and I freely admit I once very accidentally had a friend cease and desisted. Yes, actually. Since then I've backed off on the IP game, but a few of you do need to know that just because you are masked doesn't mean your IP isn't lit up like neon all over a tracker, and that it seems unusually obsessive and ties in nicely to specific blog dates. Yes, there are several, not just one, so it's nothing terribly personal, but I do think 'regular readers' are being far outpaced by a handful of 'consumed with what Pinky is doing' *cough*fans*cough*.

The people who just went on alert thinking it's them- it's not you. Seriously, I know the people who will do that, and it's not you. This isn't anything bad, it isn't upsetting me, but I think it's only fair that a few regulars kind of know this happens in case I trigger again. I'll try to hold it down to Pond of Death and keep it private. Regulars also need to know this is common. This happens all the time all over the internet in every form of media, and I knew coming back out I would need to be psychologically prepared to handle being so visible.

I share because

• I hope I'm good for people
• so I don't have to talk on the phone repeating stuff to individuals
• I need the public awareness for the kind of support system and safety net I've constructed around myself
• I have disappeared before without explanation and upset a few people

"We scare because we care."

the winds of change, or #kissmybatch

Time for some changes.


Six months ago I wrote faith in humanity. I very seriously meant every word I wrote in that post. I won't bore you with redundancy.

Facebook allows me to unfollow without unfriending so that things don't pop up and surprise me in feeds. Bless them for that. I'm not going to tell anyone what they can or can't do on their own timelines and blogs and whatevs, but I've said over and over I suck as a friend. Y'all can share all the spiders and mutilated pets and ground up baby burgers and freaked out vehement hate you want, but I can't wade through that to get to the one or two little updates about actual stuff in your real life. I'm sorry I'm not that strong, but I'm just not, so if I seem distant, it's probably because I can't see what's happening.

Twitter doesn't have a stay friends but unfollow option because the core of twitter relies on a tagging system, which makes muting someone a joke. I want to see some of the things I'm tagged in, but I also want to avoid some of the things I'm group tagged in coming in on the same stream. Alas, muting doesn't take care of this problem at all.


It would seem my only choice in this kind of situation is to block someone, because simply unfriending them doesn't stop the tag from getting through into my notifications. However, blocking doesn't work, either, if someone uses multiple accounts or the rest of the group keeps tagging me. I've tried everything on twitter, including spending hours of time over two years fine tuning list feeds and learning every trick out there, and I don't know what else to do.

What I'd really love to see happen on twitter is a priority notification feed, where I could filter notifications from people I don't want to miss out from the whole splat of incoming tag notifications. (The fave people option they tested last year also doesn't take care of the notification problem.) I've got hootsuite set up for a couple of things, but I'm not seeing a way to prioritize tags there, either. I could set hootsuite to stream fave people so I'd catch all their notifications there, but then I'd have to wade through every single thing at least 50 people tweet just to see what I'm tagged in, again, doesn't solve the problem. With facebook, I can elect to stop receiving notifications when I'm tired of a convo thread, but with twitter I'm stuck with continual notifications as long as the convo keeps going, even if I never respond, just because I am tagged in it.

What would Wil Wheaton do? Simply ignore and not respond, I guess, which is the original advice I got years ago anyway. Arg, this is hard. You wouldn't believe some of the junk I hafta wade through just to see tags from a handful of people I actually do want to see. I've had days where I get tagged nearly a thousand times, a few days more than that, one really oddball crazy day was nearly 3000. Been awhile since that one.


This is how aspienado agonizes. I use to inflict miles of thought process on innocent souls until they couldn't take it any more, then it was private blogs, now Pinky blog is letting aspienado whine 1- if it's brief, and 2- if it amuses Pinky.

It bothers me to reach a point where I consider actually cutting people off over a matter of inconvenience, because they are people and they are my friends. I'm trying really really hard, but I sure do wanna pop out a few eyeballs and toy with some brains, string brain coils out like yarn through eye sockets and stuff, but then I'd be an anti-friend and it would've been better to unfollow and block. So I'm arg-ing on a blog post.

this clicks to the most incredible etsy gift selection I've ever seen

In the meantime, I need to keep up with my own growth and get back on track. I keep saying that, don't I? Yes, I called my staff in to a planning meeting today, I'm already cracking the whip over them, and they're whining like a buncha babies that we're still on holiday time.

#TGLPof2015

The day after the day before.

Wrapping the ol' bean around another day.


We've been crunching our way through the great ladybug plague of 2015, or #TGLPof2015. I'm thankful it's not as bad as last year's Town Infested With Swarm of Ladybugs Will Completely Freak You Out, but that was in another country. They made the news around here last year with Ladybug-like bugs infesting Missouri homes, which drives a person to look up things like Asian Lady Beetle vs. Ladybug and Good and Bad Ladybugs.

A person can study other people's words, but I prefer observation. Over the years I've noticed that it doesn't make a difference which one is coming into my house, because they both are. I've also noticed that the descriptions other people give generally don't include variations of solid black, solid white (I've got a picture of that one), a weird pink, varying shades of yellow (both with and without spots), even a green one here or there, besides the usual red and orange. I've noticed the spots can vary on the red and orange, too. Once in awhile I see one with only one spot on either side, or unmatching patterns from side to side, or straight lines of little spots, or spots so big there's room for only three on each side, or missing spots completely even on both the red and orange. All of these I've actually seen crawling around, usually on me. THE MEANINGS OF THE COLORS OF LADYBUGS totally backs me up on this.

There is also such a thing as blue ladybugs. Seriously. Check out Real Blue Ladybug Pictures! And there is one on a youtube.


I've personally never seen a blue one. Apparently, they also come in a range of blues and purples, and I would probably be less crabby about them flying up my nose while I'm driving or dive bombing right into my beverages or crawling all over every surface in my house if they were blue, because I really like blue. Click this to check out the blue ones.

And @TScottBrave is right, some of them bite like heck. Also, ladybug infestations can cause significant allergy responses, so there you go. Not the cute little cute things people think they are. I've cranked about having to dig them out of my ears and how difficult it is to get one off an eyelid without crunching them to bits right into your eye. I won't even mention how stupid going to the bathroom is with them around.

Back to my day. I've been rearranging my calendar since November began to stay ahead of the bus trying to run me over, but yesterday mowed me flat, so now it's recoup and hope a hawk doesn't spot me lying feebly on a rock and eat me. I need to be out the door by 8:00, very slowly and gently scraping myself together into a cohesive and hopefully coordinated, if not exactly complimentary, body set in motion. I'll probably klutz through the day and leave a wake of unintentional misdeeds. BUT HEY. I got @bonenado's hunting gear into the wash this morning. I've only been meaning to get to that for 2 weeks.

I forgot how sticky 2 year olds can be. My house is getting sticky. Nearly everything I touch is sticky.

 

I wanna be sleeping like Batman.

K, I need to focus. Youtube is trying to get me to watch Celtic Woman doing Christmas tunes.

click to see a list of Celtic Woman doing Christmas tunes

I'm going with an oldie but goodie. Pinky needs a brain hug. This is for #allthefandoms and hanging on for dear life down the wild and crazy holiday slide until we crash into tax season. I love you guys.

'facing' prosopagnosia

I mention having a facial recognition problem every little bit. Last night during a couple of new TV shows I scored on a couple of actor spottings before Scott did, and he was all like wow, you're getting better at this.

Information About Prosopagnosia --Click that.

I've been paying real attention the last few months on what exactly helps me recognize people. For instance, from my original post on mind blindness-

Likewise, I get tv personalities mixed up like crazy. I never could keep Dan Rather straight from a couple of other news reporters. There are a few actresses I can keep straight because I've seen their movies so often (usually scifi movies), and by now Harrison Ford is iconic in my head, but I had no idea Steve Carell, Dan Burns, Maxwell Smart, Evan Baxter, and the mayor of Whoville were all the same guy. Do you know how many times I saw the complete Star Wars trilogy before I knew who Mark Hammill was? Probably dozens.

So you guys probably don't realize, after three months of Benedict vids, that the marker I use to recognize him across character changes is the way his eyebrows look as he turns. For some reason, I'm pretty good with eyebrows.

Since I already mistakenly auto-sub eye and hair color for everyone I see with my faulty cataloging system, I can't count on eye color since his crazy eyes change color almost scene to scene, as confirmed by rabid fans around the world and this article mentioning sectoral heterochromia. (His eyes even have their own blog.) My own eyes are a mix of yellow and brown that I think make me look kind of werewolf-y in certain lights, which I bring up in my 100 Girly Questions Survey.

click for more Ben eye studies

The last thing on a person's face I can manage is noses for some reason, so everyone that I recall in my mind either has a blur there or a variety of noses I can plug in like a Potato Head. I'm pretty good with silhouettes, so the way a face moves means more to me than how a face is arranged. The more quirky a face is, the easier it is for me to remember and keep attached to a name, so Steve Buscemi has been a favorite for years, plus I actually like him. Cartoons and animation, on the other hand, are EASY. I never forget an artistically depicted face.

One of the ways I do most of my actor spotting is when I hear them speak. Very few actors can disguise their voices from character to character. But last night I was on point for two actors by their faces, despite some key changes that threw Scott off, and we've both been noticing I seem to be getting at least one a week now. I'm the person that watches TV with phone in hand, pausing the DVR to race through IMDB links, and I'm usually wrong, so me getting two right in one night this week was epic. I think I'm getting the hang of 'tagging' face parts in a sort of linear way so I can keep names attached to them.

I've said in the past that I'm a Sherlock fan, not a Benedict fan. I'm also obviously a Khan fan. What I need to be clear about is that I don't dislike or shun Benedict as a person. I simply don't recognize him from one movie or interview to another, so I don't attach any sort of meaning to his face unless he's doing a particular character that I'm watching. I'm very Benedict deficient when it comes to Ben fandom. It kind of hit me the other day that some people might misunderstand why, since there's been a little controversy around him here and there, which I could care less about.

I don't often see people talking about fandoms from a point of view like mine, a prosopagnosic asexual. Since I am, as a fansite owner, a highly visible representative of a show that actually uses continually sexualized characters, themes, and plot devices, I imagine it's difficult to think of me not giving an eyeblink to any of it. Lexx is brilliantly done. I love every shred of it unconditionally, like I do Sherlock. Star Trek, as some of you have seen, is a whole other beast for me, conditions galore had to be addressed before I finally embraced the new timeline.

You can see the impact prosopagnosia has had on me being a fan. I really do obsess over story lines and characters, film edits and effects, and the way I get swept up into a story. I could be halfway through a show before I realize someone I like from something else is in it, so I'm not just following actors around from show to show like many fans do. Either I very seriously love a character portrayal or I don't, and usually don't even care about stuff like Batfleck quibbles.

This has actually been a taking a break post, time to get back to the other thing I am working on.

bracing for the airbag

My post The Nerdist Wayfarer has taken out quarter stats on a one year old blog in a week flat. All-time top posts on that blog remain tied between Life as Social Media Art (thanx to @VickiAddesso) and Are you a robot? thanx to @DawnSnarks and @TonySolo. Since that robot post, incidentally, I've been diagnosed with spells of manic euphoria on top of having Asperger's, which probably helps makes sense of what was going on there. Now that I know what that is, I've been able to recognize it a few more times since.

I still feel a little dizzy from all going-public stuff but I think it's been good for my family and a few friends. After growing up in an atmosphere of pretense for the public and then living with the kind of social anxiety that keeps me from interacting with more than one or two 'real' people at a time, I know it's been very very good for ME.

Saw the lunar eclipse for the first time since my supermoon photo in 2011. I have different tech now, so I'm not crazy about the pic I got this time. Between long bouts of cloud cover and being surrounded by forest, it's really chancy I see anything cool out in space at all, so it was nice standing at my bedroom window this morning seeing that big ol' moon perfectly framed above Mirkwood and a sprinkle of stars all around it. After fumbling with the camera, sure makes a person appreciate how well eyeballs work.

Flying through the week getting tons of stuff done. Yesterday tore down all the curtains in the house and got them washed up, wiped all the Torchwoods off my DVR because there is just no way I've got the time to ever catch up on them, starting inventory lists for holidays and maybe a trip next spring. Lot of decisiveness happening. This pic clicks to a post that contains a link to the original source, just scroll down to the pic there if you don't feel like reading the whole thing.

Wow, I come up on page one on a google search for 'holiday slide'. If you're reading this in the future and that has changed, it goes to this post, much LOLing happening all over my keyboard right now.


Kinda late getting bizzy on my stuff, but that's ok. I mentioned that holiday slide, right? Today is burrito's mama's birthday, my brother's youngest might be popping a baby today (and her birthday was two days ago), my sister's youngest has an OB appt tomorrow, that sister's birthday is Saturday, Holly's birthday is Sunday, my birthday is on United Nations Day, there's another birthday the day before Halloween, and I think Scott's parents' anniversary is either the 30th or 31st, and then I nearly always miss my brother's birthday because it's the second after all that, and the ball just keeps on rolling in this fashion up through New Year's. I can barely keep track any more, and will definitely be updating the list for my dad. You should've seen September, it was almost as packed.

Oldie but goodie. Kinda how life feels on the holiday slide.