human thought congealing onto physical items

click for cool photography

Finally had to throw a pair of my fave jeans away. Pretty sure I've had them at least 8 years, and they're irreplaceable since they stopped making that kind. I used to do extensive online searches, they're just gone. Oh, well. I'll never forget them. But I got another pair of jeans on $5 clearance yesterday just because it's an out of season color, so I'm all good. Shazam.

There's a worldwide convo going on again lately about shadowbanning. A lot of people don't realize this isn't new. They're getting so good at it that we're allowed to use it ourselves now. We can unfollow without unfriending, we can mute without a notification going out about it. We can keep our followers without losing them even though we don't want to see what they say. So we ourselves also shadowban our own friends and families.

So we get to use medias created and hosted by corporations that allow us to use their services for free. If it involves communication, we get some level of free use with certain agreements. We are allowed to communicate with one another. No one questions this, in fact, many think it's their right to use this free service. We have been lead to believe we have the right to use communication services free of charge.

Everything from there is a matter of definition, and pretty much a joke. We hand our words and thoughts over to free hosting services and expect them to 'play fair' and 'be legal' and whatever. Then when those free services start making our usage a little more difficult, we protest. We have to right to use others' properties in the way we see fit. Right?

Someone is making money on you wanting to communicate with their 'free' communication service. How they make that money gets hotly debated over all around the world. How we keep allowing them to use us as part of their branding products to make that money blows my mind. But it's what we've got, and yes, I use devices and platforms myself.

So we're on the brink of the types of communication we're allowed to have being redefined, and a lot of how they'll control it is through shadowbanning. Is that unfair?

I'm not arguing for companies to be able to abuse customers who don't yet realize they are literally part of the product. I'm not saying we should be ok with communication being cut off behind our backs without our knowing it. I'm especially not saying it's ok for our communication to be hacked and monitored, but when all boils down, I'm glad they can be legally ordered to share that in, say, missing persons cases and stuff. Which pretty much means they legally do have to monitor...

I shared a post yesterday about U.S. citizens being able to legally mail children through the postal service for a short time in our past. Can you imagine? But, think about it, snail mail is currently the only private communication you can have with anyone across a distance. Well, I don't know about around the entire world, but you know what I mean. The world just doesn't have the man power to open every envelope, you know? Yet they can easily monitor every word you say on a phone nowadays.

Perhaps it's time to relearn the finer arts of snailing our thoughts around again. Maybe it's time to get back to actually paying for our own communication with a book of stamps. All this free stuff is corrupting us, blinding us to what we believe is our right when we're all being herded into communication corrals and locked up with shadowbanning.

I guess a lot of you don't even remember not having email. You can't imagine living without instant communication. You don't know that it's possible to get the most important things said so privately that no one ever knows but you. Imagine having a machine to type on and there being no record of anything you ever type to come back and bite you. No hard drive, no other owner, no big brother.

Pencils and paper are important. If you are ever stuck in a blackout, on a stalled highway, or somewhere else with tech fail going down all around you, YOU CAN STILL COMMUNICATE. I fondly think of it as someone reading my mind through time.

Spiral notebooks are like security blankets. When all else fails, keep a notebook with you in the car, in your purse or a bag, just keep one around everywhere you go, and you will always be able to communicate. Why am I saying this? Well, I can imagine a scenario where all our phones go dead, where the grid goes down, where we literally cannot access social medias to see what is going on, cannot get a call through to anyone about what is going on, and what we'll be left with is writing down what is going on.

Don't be a slave and think you are helpless when it all goes down. Be ready to own your future. And I'll tell you right now I'm not going to harass you one bit about grammar and spelling and penmanship as long as you can get ideas across. The most important idea in the world could be written in pictographs, and I would be fine with that. Throw in a few maps and depictions of what's going on, write out what's happening, share your feelings, make paper airplanes, be human.

And if nothing bad ever happens, think about keeping some paper and pencils around anyway. They practically keep forever.

I'm actually boring myself

About a week or so ago, Google changed the way you can access images in search. For years I've been able to get to cached image storage after websites went private or even deleted. That button is gone now. Sourcing images back to original original source technically no longer exists. This might seem irrelevant to some, but it's actually huge in a world of restricting access. It's not that big of a deal for me, since I mostly play with memes (and I try to give credit with link backs whenever possible), but for some people this means no longer being able to source original news photos that have gone viral. Something to think about.

Youtube opinion accounts are being shut down this last week, whether they are monetized or not, and at least one person has been interviewed by a major television news network citing the algorithm fallout already affecting his real life business so badly that he lost it. That was fast. Was I the only one to notice how fast that was? Anyway, the U.S. is being virtually cut off from search fields across medias, not out of malice, but out of opportunity. Hands are being tied as the FCC and internet regulations are allowing much bigger hands to insist on removing what gets in their ways. Facebook has been restricting feeds and posting capabilities for a couple of months, judging by the complaints I've seen, twitter went on a bot purge cleaning house (I wonder why they only picked Russian bots, because I'm really tired of purging the spam and porn and automated vitriol from the rest of the world, as well), and as accounts shift to new hosts hoping to survive, the web is shifting like a ship on a scary ocean. Well, at least for Americans. Funny thing is, I don't think most people are noticing. Unless you are following live news broadcasts and live feeds and noticing some things are literally being scrubbed back off the internet within the hour, you really have no idea. I've been on the webs since 1994 and have never seen anything like it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That was last night. This is today.


I think I'm getting my life back. I coughed myself into a what feels like a neck sprain through all that flu and cold virus stuff back to back, and I made an appointment for next week to talk to someone about checking on possible herniated incision since it's still so soon after gallbladder removal (a little over 3 months, but 18-24 months for complete healing and incisions always remain weak spots), but that's what coughing does, right, it wrecks you up and makes you miserable and then it's such a relief when it's over. Hopefully it's just an acute fibro of the abdomen flare, and that's actually a real thing and sucks a bit.

• From Fibromyalgia and You- "It is a systemic disease that mainly affects the muscles, their attachments (tendons, ligaments) and coverings (fascia). Fibromyalgia may be considered as soft tissue rheumatism. Fibromyalgia may also affect many other parts of the body, including the stomach, bowels and female organs."

I am noticing, though, that even having only 2 contacts with anyone for any kind of hands on physical therapy since before Christmas, my pain levels are significantly lower and much more tolerable (a really nice side effect is my general anxiety being at an all time low), and I really think that's because removing the diseased/infected gallbladder was such a relief to my entire body that many systems are going back to a normal I wasn't aware could exist. Just living with that amount of localized inflammation must've taxed my poor body 24 hours a day for months and months, and now just having that gone is making a whole lot of difference how the rest of my challenges are able to be internally addressed. Even when I should probably think I'm feeling kind of miserable, I feel so much better than I used to. I still can't believe I breezed through the actual influenza B. Really hope the A misses me. There are people around the area who've tested positive for both at the same time, plus we had at least 2 separate cold/crud viruses circulating, as well. Got pretty crazy.

I feel like this is my most boring post ever, so I may as well share that my house is a wreck and I don't care because I finally got to sit and watch TV, and it felt gooooood. I almost never see much TV any more. I thought they did a nice episode with Carl, although it felt like Negan should've been interrupting them any second, so I was way more jumpy and anxious than I usually am watching Walking Dead. And then tonight I sat through Revenge of the Sith on TV even though I own it, and used the commercial breaks to get supper put away and coffee ready for tomorrow and my pajamas on and stuff like that. Bunny and her mama have been feeling so much better enough to run around with friends again, so it's been a bit blissful just being able to sit around and let my mind go blank.

Ok, now I'm super blank, so I'm going to bed.

remembering my blogwhore roots

My klout score literally nosedived on the 22nd and is now the lowest it's been in ages. I know exactly why, too. I say that like it was huge, basically went from 60 to 58 after months of coasting. It was almost like I found my true negative factor, plugged it in and repelled people, and it all pointed to youtube. My Webmii score reflected that, too, although it's really interesting that the score goes up if my web presence search parameters are international, and then it has nothing to do with klout's final say. But basically, I diverted from my usual entertainment distractions, and I'll be honest, I didn't like myself doing that, either.

I hadn't checked impressions from keywords in awhile. I've been wondering what is the weirdest search parameters my blog has been lumped into, so I'm throwing darts at 141 pages of keyword searches and stopped in my tracks at something in Russian that translates to "riyet duck buy in kiev". Really, guys? Oh, yeah, my about page has a Darkwing Duck motif. But then another Russian search phrase translated to "amazing lightness", so I guess I have seriously breached Google around the globe. I seem to get a lot of Korean search referrals outside of my GWT list, and at least 7 different languages are represented in my top ten all time visitors. Top referring site is google.com, top referring URL is facebook.com. Basically, google pushes me out there, and facebook pulls people inward. I get instant hits from at least 4 different countries within seconds of sharing links to facebook, and another 2-3 countries within 5 minutes of sharing to twitter, depending on how I set up the tweet with hashtags and graphics cards. Internal tags and keywords do that rest. Statcounter says Pinky blog has been visited by 91 countries. I never dreamed this one would pull in traffic at all. I mean, it's not crazy or anything, but it's interesting watching where those hits come from around the world, because it's a difficult and therefore meaningful search.

But apparently more importantly, I come up on Google's 4th page for "allergic to ragweed", which is pretty outstanding, given how vague that is, 5th page for "desperate popstars", which is actually a little scary, and page ONE for "flowers for algernon book", like literally no one else talks about it or something, I dunno. Actually, I come up on page one for nearly 2 1/2 statcounter pages of google search phrases. "blue halloween" is my golden ticket with the most impressions (hundreds), "dr. evil leo" a close second, then "spock handshake", "rick lagina images", and "bird splat". Sorry, Benedict. *crickets* (Bird splat???) (I'm on a top ten google search for BIRD SPLAT.) (Sorry, that's just not sinking in.)


Sometimes I get these weird thoughts, like how I'm trying to fit in a causative universe, and then I wonder how in the world I even got that idea, like what does that even mean when I can't even imagine a noncausative universe. Rhyme and reason, me pushing google around and it pushing back. It wants to rate content, I litter content for it to rate. My existence is measured and found wanting during a fail week, and being human is rewarded with being quickly forgotten in a machinistic inclined society. To step beyond a tree falling in the woods, this brownie literally doesn't exist unless I talk about it somewhere. I'm eating a brownie. Now it can exist.

Probably the singlemost influencing fanvid of my entire blogging life.

pink spider pig!

Snip clicks to tweet so you can go follow Pagan and Nurture and Support on twitter.
and click this amazon link
(not paid to link any of that on Pinky blog)

My youtube viewer history went off the rails this week, so I'm slapping myself silly again. I think my very favorite thing in this highly promiscuous and NSFW 'pink slap meme' search are those really long toes with the pink toenails.

And I just realized that by word association half of you probably thought that my youtube viewer history going off the rails meant in a promiscuous way, so let me make you sick and really sick. Not promoting, just sharing the nauseated feeling. I tend to rocket off into the abyss like I'm skipping down a carnival strip when life plunges into dark and sucky, and I cannot say anything right now that doesn't sound smutty, so consider it another innocent jaunt into closeyoureyes land.

It's ok, though, I found pink spiderpig.


And of course that roofied me right out of Sadland into crazy and I'm good now.

I had to eat that cake off the ground

This screenshot is from the Mo Creatures server, so it clicks back to the website.

This week got pretty rough, so by Wednesday I gave myself the rest of the week off. I was bummed out not knowing what to do with the dive into sad, so I told admin it was a rough week and suddenly found myself being invisibly caked up and fireworks going off all around me, which helped lift my mood up a bit because it was such a funny surprise. After that I hung out with staff going all pyro watching a build copy burn. It felt right.

After that I played around creating single player worlds with forge and the Mo Creatures mod pack. I super cranked up the ores.

And then I took my cue from Bunny, just started spawning colorful things like birds

and butterflies.

That helped, too. And then I spent Thursday on the server mining out the rest of a pit down to bedrock

A lawyer showed up to check on my XP grinder, citing reckless containment of dangerous fugitives.

and killing a bunch of mobs, which also felt good. This guy lost his cowboy hat.

In between times I went on youtube binges, some good, some bad. Started with the usual Space Cowboy, wandered into #bencongruity, and next thing you know I'm bouncing back and forth from weird stuff to 80s oldies but it kept me distracted pretty well. If you're having one of those days, here you go, part of my vid trail. If you trigger easily or don't care for Benny C, you might wanna skip some of these. Let this first one be a warning to you.



I blame this one for triggering the 80s mood.


And next thing you know, there I went. This actually is a pretty good video.


I will be a Corey fan till the day I die. He is braver than anyone I've ever seen in Hollywood.


A lot of 80s music looks so experimental now in highsight. The whole MTV thing.


I mean, you gotta laugh, but seriously. I look back and see how staged all our music genres have been. Planned.


And now we literally have a decade of movies spelling all the stuff out for us. This movie alone completely normalized the entire thing without anyone raising a single eyebrow, not to mention completely screwed google search for certain phrases and word combos. Like magic... Still, makes for super awesome fanvid material. (And that's the point, isn't it? Ben caught you.) Ironically, the official official website of the real real people went live on the cusp of this movie. Everyone seemed to miss that timing.


This wasn't creepy at all. O_O The helicopter shot of those buildings, though. After seeing this, I'm laughing that the rest of the world kept trying to say 'conspiracy'. That's as real as it gets.


Took a little break and laughed. (But you know how I feel.)
Things you only notice about Harry Potter as an adult



I'll just shut up now


before I wind back up in humans as products.



Because depending on who wins, one day we'll be able to buy this kind of stuff, where we want to recreate our lives, hand ourselves over to be 'fixed', and turned loose to feel better without having to think about what happened to us and what was required. If it beats depression, who cares, right? I'm betting it won't be that long till people line up for the brain chips. (In case you need a quick diversion before you go on, I used to talk a bit more about that kind of stuff.)
The first human brain-to-brain interface has been created. In the future, will we all be linked telepathically?


Well, here's what I think.

clicks to source

=/

death days

I wrote this about a year and a half ago. That pretty much covers how stupid dealing on a death week can be. And that didn't even touch the years afterward, going through that over and over.

Tomorrow is a different death day. Again, the people immediately around me have no idea what's in my head, heart, and soul, and I'm lost how to keep processing the incongruity of living with loss and how it affects my relationships with the people I'm still with in real life.

Some people don't get it. Some people do. Some people are born seeing all this stuff. Some aren't. I don't talk a lot, but the people who can't get me to shut up probably think I'm just crazy. Like I mentioned in the first link, I won't be apologizing when it comes time. I don't think we stop when our bodies are done, and I think what we're doing here is more important than we can imagine. Why else would death feel like the most important thing in this world, and everything we are centered around it.

We Are Pinky

And then I remember who I am and everything is ok again.

hating on my life for a brief moment

You know how you do stuff because someone else pushes you into it, and you go ok because that's the only way you really seem to get to do anything with that person, and then once you get into it they either get busy or lose interest, and then you're doing it by yourself, right. That happens to me over and over and over. My family, my friends, nearly everyone I interact with.

Sometimes I try to turn it around, let's do what I want to do, and they rarely follow me into what I like, or if they do they kinda misinterpret and send me into facepalm fails and I have regrets galore. So I have learned to just stop showing people what I really like. I mean, even on Pinky blog, you guys really don't have a clue what I really really like.

Finding something to enjoy with someone is hard. Finding someone who fills a spot where both just enjoy hanging out is rare and precious. When I see people who understand this, I feel less alone. When I see other people who can't imagine being this lonely, I feel jealous.

Anyway, so I have adapted to something I got pulled into, I remember balking at the start about the goals and how much work it looked like and way too interactive, and now I'm actually doing it and enjoying it immensely, and I'm feeling left behind again.

Trying new things for other people can't be a thing any more. I have spent so many hours of my life adapting to other people's whims or lifestyles. If I were to add up all those hours, counting all my family, we're talking decades of my life.

It's weird reaching a place and suddenly realizing I didn't get to do what *I* want to do with my own life. Much of the rebellion was escape or distraction. Much of the settling was with the idea that eventually I'd be happier with people than without them, or at least less alone. Oddly, the blaring reality is how alone I feel with people around me everywhere. But at least I can say I tried.

I know a lot of people don't get to do what they want, but one of the incongruities was that my dad did, and he's the most alone person I know. He got to do the motorcycles and exotic hunting on horseback, the traveling, the big ranching and farming. He got to dabble in all the little dreams, and he had money tied up in it.

I always dreamed of traveling, but I kept winding up with the wrong people. I always dreamed of having my own place, but again, wound up with the wrong people for that. So many people have directed my life path without even noticing or caring what I even wanted, that if I don't just point blank say it out loud, my own husband doesn't have a clue. And it's not because he's mean. He's just excruciatingly in his own head doing his own thing his own way. So many people are just born like that.

And then I see people once in awhile who actually get to make all their own life choices, and they complain about so many little things in their day that I feel like tearing my hair out. They chose it and it's still not good enough to embrace. Actually getting to choose and execute one's own will on one's own life is so rare.

If I were to say what I'm really thinking I would lose everyone. I have no one to talk to that wouldn't stab me in the back or walk away and never speak to me. Weirdly, I watched someone else go through this same problem recently, and the fallout that created. I know I can't behave like that.

If I could change one thing in my life right now, I'd make myself not allergic to anything so I could eat a great big sandwich and a bunch of guacamole. If any of you out there run into this and you're feeling all glum and stuff, cheer up and go eat a f*ing sandwich, because I can't. Just go do something while you still can and don't whine about it making you fat. Good lord.

💖

temperamental

*Head spins looking at the weekly/monthly charts I made at the beginning of the year. What was I thinking?*

Woke up to thunderstorms, so that nixed downloading the server updates. I have less than 6 hours till I pick Bunny up for an appointment, plus stuff I need to do in town when we go in. I had a rock solid plan to sling rugs and curtains into the wash this morning while I sparkle the kitchen floor back to unicorn status, and nothing in brain or body this morning is remembering that was a plan. The gung ho is gone. >=l After a weekend blitzing puke bedding (thank you, Bunny) and nearly everything else washable in this house at the tail end of 2 very long weeks of back to back viruses heavily laced with Hulked up seasonal allergies (yes, allergies in the winter, who's with me on evergreen trees pollinating?), I just don't feel like caring. Because the fail is happening this morning, I have peeled all the rest down in my brain to nothing else gets done till THAT gets done, and we all know how I dread things piling up, which is why I'm a washaholic, so I'm focusing on imaging how delighted I'll be when the floor really is done vs wandering off to do something else. Like blog...

At least I'm documenting whining about it.

Still coughing. Still surfing on antihistamines around the clock. Came this close to hitting my prednisone backstock yesterday but finally kicked the cough for a bit with extra benadryl. I feel like a dried out pickle. What's grosser than a limp dried out pickle.

Meanwhile. Ok, there is no meanwhile. There is nothing but a downpour outside and my body actually protesting coffee this morning because coffee makes the dried up pickle feeling grosser.

Now it's 5 hours. I was updating new link html elsewhere, not associated with Pinky. Guys, I have met my match. I have found people who literally live in the matrix and work nearly nonstop because they're addicted to it. If I manage to keep up with them, I'll be uber conquering if I can also manage to keep my fleet going.

Oh, yeah, THAT is what the weekly/monthly lists were for. Gotcha.

Doesn't make me want to do the floor, though. I may hafta pounce and wrangle myself into force mopping. It's not pretty, but it works. Ah, just scared the minions, now they're begging for chocolate to make up for it. I know what they're doing, they think that will soothe big bad me back down into distraction, so NO WAY! Ha.

Yes, I am that cruel, I torture my own self.

*getting the chocolate chips*

Meh.

I might've misread that. As soon as I got up to get those, I felt like doing stuff. Nothing like a double agent slick move there. I can't keep up with all that stuff in my head. Whatever.

I've got a floor to clean. A friend of mine in Brazil just charted in English book sales after translation from Portuguese and I'm still sitting here fighting with myself...

Screenshot 285

That was the only screenshot I got from last night's #latenightmovie watch with @LNMGang in the SyfyDesigns chatroom. I think I bailed with only 15 minutes to go because I'd been up nearly 24 hours. I was back up an hour later to help with Bunny puke, so there you go.

I'm kind of in an in-between state elsewhere because I need to re-download updated game files before I can even get in to moderate, plus not sure what's happening with possibly another trip to urgent care this weekend and stuff, nevermind my own week long coughing AFTER I was cleared for influenza after a prior week of swilling in germs all around me while I chunked down tamiflu. I was reading last night that at least 3 different influenza strains are going around the U.S. right now, and that the type A is the one everyone is saying 10% about with the shot, all the rest are much better percentages, so don't blow off the flu shots as worthless yet. I can't remember if I had a trivalent or quadrivalent but so far I haven't gone down super hard, not a speck of fever yet, and likely the deep chest coughing as much to blame on super pollen surge and resulting uber goober sinus infection, BUT I'm exhausted, as you can imagine. I'm not sure I can handle another Bunny day off from school without crying, between all the weather and sick days.

So I diverted into Screenshot Land this morning. I moved and deleted 80-something screenshots, and I'm about to dump a bunch of movie gang screens in here so I can delete those, too. I don't always share what I got, but maybe today is the day for it.

We watched this movie on January 13th.

Proof that Kurt is supernatural, and possibly demonic.

You can see we were all over the map on how far we were into the movie. We're a jolly bunch.

Remember this lesson, kids. If you ever find yourself in a building with Paul Reiser, flee the building asahp. (As Soon As Humanly Possible.)

Oh, yeah, ketchup bottle shopping. That was fun.

Where else do you casually talk fashion and how people are cooked? Oh, yeah, Bohemian Grove. Welp, guess me and gang are cutting edge.

Imagine being in an alt dimension where bad script writing had never developed into an art form. We'd be so lost.

Reference to the 12 Monkeys series that no one got, lol.

I can't help feeling that particular really bad movies are like an initiation ritual into underground Hollywood or something. I mean, now that we have conspiracy hindsight. Not accusing anyone in this movie of anything, but how in the world does stuff like this even get marketed, you know. Someone somewhere sacrificed a chicken.

Ok, that was all I got on that one. Now let's jump to January 20th. Kinda giggling over how people wonder about someone subs to them over and over and they can't figure out why.

Disclaimer- you don't want me watching porn with you. I ruin it. I can't help it. No one can finish anything with me laughing my head off over every stupid little thing. I'm as aro ace as it gets. I also find it redundant and therefore hideously boring, so don't bug me to watch with you.

I'll be honest, I got a little tired of the dog. He talked too much.

Lisa's comment flew over everyone's heads, which really surprised me. I think I noticed it because I always say I suck as a friend.

Oopsie, caught me in another window there. Sorry about that. Have fun trying to decipher chat.

I can imagine a future where we talk casually on medias about who we ate or fed to our dog. I think even nice people are just like that. Once you cross that line, right.

Sad Kurt was sad. I think we broke him. Also, totes missed catching the Jedi jokes.

The 70s weren't innocent at all, guys. Ok, moving on to February 10th. I did a horrible job getting screenshots on this one because I was so busy yapping on skype, my bad. Oh, I have never owned gargoyle sox.

First movie up there was mind control junk, next one was a building serial killing people, then feeding a girlfriend to a dog, and now this is interspecies breeding with aliens. I really should've been on the screenshots but this is the last one I got, and I am so, so sorry. I'm starting to get the bigger picture, though, that Lisa Marie is part of our overlord hierarchy and we are her experimentation and mind subjugation group. I hope they give her a raise or level her up to an awesome overlordier rank because she's really smooth. Took me years to figure this out. 😁

My screenshots folder is all cleaned out now. The rest of my day is about puke laundry, restocking basics like toilet paper and paper towels, and holding the residual coughing down with regular doses of benadryl, whee. I think I need some #bencongruity.

xenox

That word "xenox" rolled up in my head as part of a coding reboot installment on a computer screen during a dream last night, and I abruptly woke up. I don't recall seeing that word before, but it's everywhere.
Xenox Global (date processing management)
Urban Dictionary (random friendly stranger who seems familiar)
Precision Tools and Laboratory Equipment (dental tools, etc)
Xenox Music (Latvian YouTuber)
Sedum Xenox (a plant with pink flowers that seems to be out of stock atm)

How have I never heard of this word before, and why did it wake up me up from a dream?

Oh, and there's this. Xenox.news.com automatically pulls up C|Net Technology News with a completely different url https://www.cnet.com/news/?tag=typo. Things like that would probably get utterly lost if it weren't for old pinterest images coming up in search, like this. The search parameter was a bit of a joke, but if you need to see what it was, click the pic and look at the search bar.

It gets way more fun with this pic, which clicks out to an amusing NationStates forum convo about a god from another universe dictating industry interactions between Illuminati countries.

I love image searches. They're so random, yet so synchronous. Anyway, no idea what that even had to do with Xenox, but I'm sure it's somewhere in all those words. That's good reading, though, you should check it out. I got a big kick out of it.

And now I need coffee. Yes, writing before coffee. Haven't done that in awhile. Oh, look what I found, lol. No, I didn't watch the youtube. It clicks to a youtube. I just thought the word play was clever.

Instead of throwing a dart, I decided today I'll just slap the first Benny C vid up that youtube recommends, regardless. I'm already regretting it.



Test post, non-linked. Little layered games we play.

take this with a 5 gallon bucket of pink Himalayan salt

Some of this is silly, some of this is serious. Take what you will from it, or skip it and find better things to do. 💗

When I run into my own predictive programming and about fall outa my chair...

I like checking on reader hits here because I get a feel for what y'all find interesting, right. So I'm seeing Batman- The Day After and then following my own link embeds in that post because I totally forgot what I was writing back then, so I was going backwards in time into #TeamWells #FlashbackFriday and about fell outa my chair when I got to the last sentence.

I know right. I didn't even know I did that. Trump announced that summer and I could've cared less, and that's not why I said trumps all. I rarely use that word, and to check, I did a search on Pinky blog. Only six posts out of currently 1161 (not counting this one) use the word 'trumps', and they're mostly pretty edgy.

You guys know the big mandela effect thing started sweeping the world just before the Barry Allen Flashpoint aired, right.

Anyway, mandela effects and predictive programming are both red hot think items nowadays, and sourcing original content is becoming more precious than ever over those two things.

"You and I both know this trumps all right now." And then there's a fanvid crammed full of mandela effect entertainment and predictive programming. I made that post in 2015. Am I cutting edge or what. The sync is getting stronger and stronger.

So what comes next? I've been saying it. All through Pinky blog I've been writing about the brain training that entertainment is doing, the strange dreams I keep having, where honesty and truth really come from, and how we find out who we are. How we choose to go forward is up to us, and it's vital that we choose. #kindnessislogical It's easy to blow this stuff off, and it's ok if you don't think you can open your eyes. Just know it's time to wake up now. Whenever whatever happens, it's going to happen fast, like flipping a pancake.

The new world order is here

And that's just a cover story. Remember that something in a mirror looks backward, something turned inside out looks wrong, and that something upside down doesn't look right. Then when you see all that layered over and over in all those different ways, all smashed up and saying the same but different things oppositely until you can't tell any more what world order was really about in the first place so let's conveniently blame stuff on whoever, just keep your head down, your eyes open, and remember #kindnessislogical.

Who knows if this is real, and what will happen, but this is the kind of stuff exploding youtube lately. We love discussing The Walking Dead and The 100 and what we'd do in a crisis, maybe let's apply it to real life for a few seconds. How many countries have reprocessed their own people throughout history? All of them.

90% of you will go to FEMA camps willingly and this is why.

• ME playing devil's advocate- Your children are held in a federally sanctioned state run building nearly every day. I've seen a school lockdown. You absolutely cannot communicate with or reach your child during a lockdown. Imagine all the schools going on lockdown all at the same time. Just saying. I have nothing against schools or government, I'm just saying most of you probably haven't thought through whatever resistance you think you're going to be ready with. I bet people will line up really fast if their kids are in lockdown.
• This guy is selling something.

Warning From FEMA Liaison to GET READY!

• Here's your heads up, guys. Fallback to my state is already pretty set up, and we're all just used to it so we never really talk about it.
• This guy is NOT selling something.

Public Apology, FEMA Warning

• Drawing the line at fear porn.

Q, DEEP STATE CRAZINESS, MEET AND GREET W/MY WIFE LIVE

• Making more sense than anything else anywhere else.
• I agree about questioning the motive.

Anyway, I live in a big prepper area, and it's fairly accepted around here that the mid U.S. is fallback for D.C.

‘Ark’ 2.0: Largest Private Shelter on Earth Prepping Below Kansas Town- note the investors are from my area

Shadow Government Bunkers: Security Heightened at Underground Storage Facilities

What’s The Closest Natural Nuclear Bunker to Your Home?

The ‘Elite’ building an Underground World, why? Ozarks, Denver Airport

Ozark Mountain Data Bunker Gets Tenant

You can find that stuff all day. I find it fascinating because I love geology and karst systems.

Logically, our own government doesn't want to fail and be vulnerable. If they need to change something big with the least amount of problem possible, I'm sure they'll find a way to do it. Cooperation will be paramount because, like I said, vulnerable. They need people on their jobs, they need the economy running, they need everyone ready to handle everything, and the last thing we need is a government stumbling all over resisters that wind up getting us nuked because we're fish in a barrel. What we need to wrap our understanding around is the idea that the government above us is already embroiled in civil war over the world order thing, and it's not about the political party side taking that people are trained to gravitate into. Whatever side is the good side or bad side (and dang it, it really is hard to tell), the best way to survive and help is simply keep living your life and be ready to handle problems the same way you'd be expected to with large scale weather events. I think people want to root for their teams, but right now the teams are seeming a bit mixed up swapping shirts or something, and we can't quite tell who's on which team.

I know a lot of people are terrified we're all going to be brainwashed and tagged with microchips. It's really not feasible, nor does anyone have that kind of manpower. If the imminent danger to us is an event we're not prepared to accept is real, and we either all perish over our ignorance or survive by a few days' brutal handling, I'll take survival. People used to say 'better dead than red', and the fear is still real. But if no one of any value to resistance survives, who will keep the resistance going, whatever the resistance is, right? My dreams show me that it's vital to keep the knowledge and information that we have intact and move it forward, and if the only way through a maze is to cooperate and you've got the only piece of vital information, survival by cooperation is more important than dying for a cause or belief. That cause or belief can only survive with survivors.

My brain has already broken. I live with the glitch. I'm not afraid. I'm already brain training myself to want to feel useful and cooperative, mainly because aging makes people combative and difficult to care for, and then it's no fun to take care of people like that. I have already accepted that I don't have control, and that since I must rely on other people to care for me, I want to reward that with my own usefulness and kindness. "Against such there is no law." Underneath all the things that divide us, we are still all human, and we still all need each other. We need to remember that. Hating won't save any of us.

certified

Putting this here so I'll never forget. 💕

fluffy = deadly

Across the street from my house.
These are as tall as the second story on my house.
See how fluffy they are.
Fluffy, beautiful pollen deathinators.

Progressing nicely into the kind of ear pressure that triggers visions of lancing my ear drums. In the old days, on handfuls of meds, I'd vividly daydream about meticulously tearing bits of my body up, and even though I never acted on it, it seemed to help with the pain. Kinda like acknowledging or something. I know your sufferings, little cells. I feel your agony.

Hundreds of these line the hightway.
They're usually half brown and sickly.
They're having a very good year.
Lots of beautiful pollen, making more baby trees.
Deadly baby death trees.

My whole body has turned into a mega sprinkler system trying to scrub the pollen out of the air I'm breathing. That would be fine except breathing is a thing, so it's a little self-defeating.

This is the most beautiful juniper year I've ever seen here.
Look at all those healthy fluffy trees.
Just look at them.
Death trees.

I really hope this isn't an early indicator of an especially nasty tree spring. I know this planet is pretty, but I'm about ready for a hazmat bunker.

This is about my level of processing tonight. I'm done.