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Tuesday, July 21, 2015

sandwich pr0n

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I think we all agree that food dreams give sex dreams a run for their money when we're trying to cut down, but they also kick scary dreams up a notch, like when I suddenly bolt awake because I realize I'm relishing a sandwich with mayo on it. #lemonallergy Weirdly, I've come to enjoy tuna with buttermilk dressing since then, but wow, that was one intensely real dream after no mayo since 2010.


And then there was the night I dreamed I was eating grilled cheese, omg I was in heaven. I made it through that one without the bolting awake thing, even though I'm just as allergic to wheat now as everything else in my list and haven't eaten bread in nearly a year.


I remember the days when I could inhale a BLATO- bacon, lettuce, avocado, tomato, and onion with cream cheese spread on a sandwich.


For years, this was my fave sandwich on my way in to work. Sometimes I want a bite so bad I can hardly stand it.


I actually worked at Sonic for a year. I know every smell and taste in there by heart. Can you imagine how I died when they announced their mini dogs? That would have been perfect for someone with diabetes who isn't supposed to eat a lot of bun, but now I can't eat the bun anyway. dying


I know, someone out there is saying I can eat other kinds of bread- seriously, have you tried other kinds of bread? You don't get awesome like this. I know how to make sourdough bread from scratch. #truelove


So every once in awhile, I go through a day where nothing on God's green earth sounds good except sandwiches. I miss sandwiches.


And it's been so long now that when I make my bunless burgers smothered in a variety of sauces in expensive cheeses (they really are delightful, I'm a good cook), what my mouth thinks it's getting is this.


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