Cool, huh? Ok, where were we? Oh, yeah, time travel vs angels among us. I could add to that quantum subconscious awareness of the future, but then you'd wonder why I make so many mistakes, to which I'd answer back some gobbledygook about the light cone of all possible future events, and we'd wind up so far off track that we'd forget the rest and go get another coffee. Which I just did in my cute Halloween mug that I got unbelievably cheap on red tag clearance when I worked at Kohl's. Really miss those perks.
I'm really slipping this week. I'm stuck in a weight loss loop because I keep eating Haagen-Dazs coffee ice cream and Rice Chex (not together), and I know better. I've been shamefully neglecting facebook and its odd combo of Lexx fans, new baby pix, and various and sundry meltdowns interspersed with pet pix. I haven't checked my JanikaBanks email in over a week, maybe even two. I even declined several calls from my publisher. I blame ISIS, ebola, spiders everywhere, and my neighbor coming back after 6 months of neighborly freedom. My world just shut down and suddenly I'm hitting Amazon for fixes again, because isn't that what we are trained to do in a first world society when we feel overwhelmed.
Oh wait, I was going somewhere with a thought. Time travel exists vs angels walk among us. I was tooling around town and once again just missed being broadsided in an intersection by someone paying absolutely no attention to reality around them, and even though the impact was imminent and mere inches away, I sailed right through that intersection as if it had never been a thing, and I noticed this time (because stuff like this happens every single time I leave the house on my own, it's creepy) that I not only didn't even blink, but had no emotional reaction, not even a Ha, bet that woke somebody up as I am wont to think when envisioning someone else's oh crap moment that makes me chuckle.
Having a vivid memory of being thrown out of a violently flipping vehicle, I am acutely aware of moments in time and how our senses can stretch them out and make them feel weird. I have always been able to do this to a point ever since my childhood, not sure if it has anything to do with Asperger's or synesthesia, but yesterday for some reason seemed inside out. I can't see any way our two vehicles couldn't have passed through each other even on the corners of our headlights or taillights, because it was that close, but we both got through the light unscathed and traffic behind me flowed on like nothing happened.
Things like that make me think about existence as we know it, and what we now call glitches in the Matrix. Great big glitches exist all around us, but even Doctor Who tells us we just ignore them because we don't know what else to do with them. Philosophies have been questioning for centuries what TV shows now take for granted as plot devices. I've been making jokes for years about time inversion and the irony of time traveling, even to the point of questioning the validity of assuming reincarnation moves along in a straight time line on a single planet.
Anyway, that was my trigger for Deeper Thought (remember, we are part of a computer that Deep Thought built to find the answer to life, the universe, and everything), and it hit me yesterday that we generally don't mix time travel with angels. Why? Simplest answer- because angels can't time travel. Why are humans so interested in time travel? As per a much earlier private discussion I prompted on a now deleted facebook, I wonder if 'angels' (in part) might be beings who want something, and humans are the perfect vehicle toward achieving their goal(s) toward that want. And now that a whole TV series is based around that idea, I'm not so crackpot any more to bring it up, am I?
I will pose this, which actually goes back to C.S. Lewis' Space Trilogy- the angels that were thrown down to this planet want off, and they will do anything to make this happen. If you like Doctor Who, you'll like this trilogy, very creepy.
Something can fix time, and it's not angels. When we pray for safety (and I've seen this work over and over in astonishing ways), the most you can say, if you don't believe anyone 'out there' is listening, is that we control our realities around us when we are more 'in tune' with our own existences. I'll accept that, but I still don't think individuals have power of themselves, but it comes from somewhere. If you want to believe in the Force, fine, I'll accept that, too. Humans are able to plug into an unseen unknowable Something that sharpens us into more than just bumbling genetic copies. I'll make note here to anyone scoffing about nothing more being 'out there'- you have to work really hard to believe that, especially when death looms. I've been there. I've tried not believing. If you have to remind yourself you don't believe, then deep down you really do believe. Humans can't help this. Whether aliens programmed us to be this way or we evolved it naturally somehow, nearly the entire human race automatically thinks there is something bigger out there out to 'get us' or help us. I'm not going to argue any more about this. It's something we as a race can't seem to switch off. Terry Pratchett would back me up.
Back to my Thought. Something fixes things. Sometimes something unexplainable happens or pops right up in front of us, and we go along forgetting about it. If this weren't a real creepy thing for us, I doubt all the TV shows and movies with this kinda of stuff happening would be so entertaining. I think it's a real thing that cause doesn't necessarily lead to effect, and THAT is what creeps us out. We spend all our lives learning to accept that we really can't be magic and fly, like we assumed when we were small children (where does that assumption come from?), and then weird stuff happens like two cars passing through each other in an intersection and the rest of the day is inside out and upside down because suddenly there is a bit of fuzzy memory in the middle of all that vivid moments stuff.
By the way, Blogger wants me to tell you guys it tried to get me to use 'inexplicable' up there, and I rudely shoved it out of the way. Blogger is a whiny pouty sulky thing today, actually locked up my screen for a couple of minutes. OH, and I just found a word it folded up till I clicked on it. Very clever.
So the question now is- can we trust our memories? Are our memories adjustable to match the game? Because sometimes it feels awfully like we're inside a game system. I said nearly 20 years ago we are like Mario, bouncing off walls that might not even be there, and dang if that idea didn't suddenly burst forth on our big screens.
I think we all know what is going on. We're just afraid to say it.
This whole post is me stalling because I'm in a funk and don't want to GET TO WORK!
This is how I feel reading physics books. For reals. Hawking, Gleick, Kaku- all those boyz get me worked up. I'm so close to turning the corner into the cool stuff now that it's hard to hold back and keep grinding through the mundane scaffolding that got me this far. This song is about taking a cool book home from the library or bookstore, right?