Popping up out of a rabbit hole. Went deep, hard and fast, but I remembered to keep it really short and come up for air a lot. The house is actually clean, laundry is done, real food is on deck.
This was a strange thing to see. I wasn't aware that ents on MoCreatures have 'children', but I actually saw an ent go around planting things in 9s. These are birch saplings. I also ran across sets of 9 in other things, like dandelions. I think it's really rare. I've seen plenty of ents, never saw this kind of pattern before.
It's that time of year. This is the month things go screwy and I timeslip, and alla sudden I freak out that the 4th of July is already over and I missed it and I really didn't, and last year I figured out it had something to do with my mom's birthday on the 12 year glitch. As normal as last year felt, this whole spring has been off the rails, and I'm already skidding off track with my June stuff earlier than usual. A lot of it has to do with losing a baby after Mother's Day and May coming full circle with an event in my past, which is part of the bigger picture that goes all the way back to the original April.
As with all the other huge progress I seem to be making, I hope this is the year I finally wrap this angsty stuff up. I never noticed before that the whole April-May-June thing is a continuous flow of me feeling like time is jaggedly going by in all these broken chunks. Anyway, all new path now, lots of all new things going on, maybe being able to see the bigger picture will be my release from the angsty pattern I kept repeating.
I know that stretch of time will always be part of me, and I know I'll fall into it sometimes and feel all the feels again, but I know I'm not trapped any more. Listening to this song is so different now than listening to it 9 months ago.
