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-Personal blog for Janika Banks.
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Monday, July 4, 2016

now I need a Scooby snack

We've had a weird situation where @bonenado and I have practically been accusing each other of having Alzheimer's all week. Not our first, some might remember the lost video camera and stuff, but this was zucchini. Normally zucchini mystery comes from wondering who left it on your porch, but everyone knows we know it's our next door neighbor because he has a guilt thing about throwing monster woody squash out, so he gifts it instead. When we ask him not to, he says it's for our chickens. When we remind him (we're next door) we haven't had chickens in well over a year now, he just walks off and leaves us wondering what to do with it, so we fling it off the back deck and watch it smash delightfully on the trees, and then we get deer and groundhogs coming up out of Mirkwood to eat it.  He doesn't like to feed the wildlife so he gives it to us.

Ok, that wasn't where I was going with this. The neighbor finally stopped sharing his produce with us because after ten years of inedible mystery monster veggies showing up in piles on our deck, we finally just put both our feet down and said We don't want anything from your garden and then had a ridiculous convo about just trying to be neighborly and here I go again. THIS zucchini was from a grocery store. Just know that, and we still don't know how it got here. I know, I keep talking like this. It's very mysterious.

I was unloading the groceries from the cart in Walmart while I was out with @bonenado last week, and I was irked to see he'd secretly smuggled in a couple of zucchini. I rolled my eyes and didn't say anything. He's a weirdo and I just roll. Got home, was putting the groceries away and rolled my eyes again when I noticed the one yellow squash hadn't been bagged in its own little veggie bag after I handed it to him, but the zucchini obviously had, so I just rolled the yellow squash up in the walmart bag and stuck it in the fridge and never said anything.

Days later, after one of the zucchini had been consumed and I need to get the rest of that squash cooked up, I finally asked why he didn't bag up the yellow squash but he did the zucchini. Skip a couple of really weird hours where we both thought the other really had cracked this time. Turns out we never bought that zucchini. Neither one of us put it into the cart, AND we were never charged for it. We dug out the receipts, it's true. But I remember getting them out of the cart...

Explain that one. It's almost like a double homicide without the death. A healthycide? I can understand someone else possibly getting the wrong cart or playing a weird joke (or @bonenado still having Alzheimer's), but not to be charged on top of it really creeped us out.

My Batman has been sick with some kind of weird germ going around the Gulf Coast. I don't think it's Zika, but it sucketh, and now the Batmom and Batdad have it, many feels for them on the Fourth. Meanwhile, Bunny rules the world from her vaca at a water park hotel. I zoomed in on the wave. She's way up there and it kinda freaks me out. Hang on, Edge has got Jawn in a headlock. This clicks to the ridiculous help advice in case you have the same problemo. #appwars


Wound up having to reboot over complete lock up,



and then got this trying to resize. I had to go around it by saving with a new title.


THAT is Microsoft wrestling control away from Chrome. Windows 10 insists on converting to their own photo app thingy, but it just doesn't work when I'm actually working in a Chrome browser. Big fail there, Microsoft. We must learn to share our toys.

Ok, back to Bunny. I cropped it and then zoomed, she is really high up there.


This kid was made for owning the world. She's not quite 3 and she's already at home with #allthethings. It's cracking us up comparing vaca pix to our own kids (their parents) at the exact same ages- noncompliance, crying, terrified of Bugs Bunny...


Maybe our kids are just doing it better than we did.

Our neighbors have already made sure it sounds like we're in a war zone every night for the last week solid, and I'm sure will continue through the rest of this week and possibly even month, so we're naturally not even interested in anything fireworky. We just want to sleep. I can't even imagine the pets and wildlife within our 2 mile radius. The mountain lion was real, here's proof we have them, the studies predicting their return (includes maps), and a list of confirmed sightings (I'm right next to Taney County), so yeah. Let's pull out our favorite Pumaman song! First, the original scene as seen on MST3K.



We always wondered why the most indigenous looking person didn't don the Puma Man belt, since he's a better fighter... @LisaMarieBowman briefly mentioned Pumaman in one of her reviews a couple of years ago. I think she'd have enjoyed it more with the song in it.

I've had the privilege over the last month of getting to see further into myself than ever before, more aspienado waking up kind of thing, and I just wanna say thanx again to everyone who has ever put up with me. I know I'm difficult. I can't say more because I don't have the words yet. They need time to percolate through me until they spill out. It's a kind of timeline thing, the before and after, and the paradox of the unaware traveling alongside the unaware in a new awareness of being unaware.


:edit:

Btw, wanna mention that this archive post that I linked on twitter this weekend got me into a "Great Writers" list. I know lists are a dime a dozen, but the account that did it is a very serious book marketing firm in Germany. I looked them up. I'm used to being put on writer lists and being followed by authors and marketing accounts trying to network, but this was different. I was simply very quietly put into a list.

The root of all this very deep thought about being public comes from this convo, the heft of which I was the silent heart of the debate over technicalities. No one knew back then that Oct 6 and 8 are extremely important dates to me for personal reasons, and that my absence had nothing to do with sitting out the debate.


I take being a public person very seriously.


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