The Cassini Grand Finale was kind of like a TV series finale, wasn't it? Years with characters and a storyline, and then it's just over.
I wish Spaceman Spiff was a TV series...
So the really biggie this month was the flip off atenolol to metaprolol. Unless you're on long term meds, you probably don't realize this is a very sucky thing. Current and Resolved Drug Shortages and Discontinuations Reported to the FDA Fortunately for me, this slide over to another med actually made my life a little better, and a couple of long standing issues seem to be resolving. Atenolol is known for cold hands and feet and poor circulation, and may have exacerbated the nerve pain in one of my feet badly enough to making walking difficult. Three weeks on metaprolol seems to be relieving that issue. X-rays reconfirmed degenerative arthritis at L5S1, very common spot where nerve trunk compression causes all kinds of referred pain down the legs (hip joint and foot x-rays are fine), and since I've already been through all my physical therapy options, the best I can do is stay mobile and do the good nutrition, hydration, exercise, and sleep thing so my body will be in top shape to get through the possible shots and surgeries that come next as I get older and this possibly gets worse. It's vital that my foot be able to handle walking as long as possible, and my blood pressure pill change, of all things, seems to be helping that. Who'd a thunk.
The next really biggie this month was completing the 12 visit atlas-axis correction therapy with my chiropractor. X-ray confirmed old whiplash healed wonky and was right there on all the trigeminal and cranial neuralgia. I spent ten years working slowly up to this spot because the pain was so bad for so many years that I could no longer tolerate medications and couldn't handle conventional therapeutic hands on. Short story, I still have issues because all that scar tissue is still healing, BUT getting through focusing on this one spot for a month definitely made this year's stalled out feeling go away. My neck glide from side to side is improved (I couldn't even turn my head left 5 years ago) and I've gained in my control over pain flares. My jaw pain is nearly gone at the moment, and the pressure at the base of my skull that kamikaze'd me through two med fails this year has eased off, thank goodness.
Overall big picture, I'm still saying I'm running to keep up. This wasn't even possible 5 years ago. This year I am keeping up with a real time 3-way schedule- @bonenado's work hours, Bunny's school hours, and her mama's work hours, and I'm able to keep my balance and actually help them keep theirs. I am able to consistently be a positive function with the meals and clean up around here while they do what they need to do to keep everything going, and I'm enjoying my family. That's the really important thing. Just 5 months ago I was having a difficult time with that part because pain and meds.
We'll see how the holiday slide goes this year. This is the time of year I get all my holiday stuff lined up because by the end of October I'm usually so aspienado shutdown that I can't function, so I duck into a hole and let it all gloss over me while I look at the pretty lights. Got my chicken stock (recipe with pix if you want to try it) done up yesterday for the freezer, so the Thanksgiving prep has begun.
K, I'm over the moc thing, lotta water under a bridge and thank goodness someone sane knows how to talk me down.
Now let's have some fun. 😁
Got this in my mail. Absolutely no idea, not a clue, why, wtf, wut, nada.
When I click that link it goes to this site, which looks legit when it first pops up.
However, when I remove the ?bhu= to peel it down to an original dotcom, it goes to this.
Please note that neither address on those last two shots have my name in the site address, like the original link did in the email above.
This is not the first time I've discovered that Pinky is associated with t15h in .ru, which basically means someone has a site set up in Russia specifically for link smashing app spamming junk. Why my name? God knows. Why Andrew Potts? God knows. The only connection I have to an Andrew Potts is I once ordered Little Links merch from his keychainproductions site, plus I've made a big deal in past linking a bit of his stuff around my blogs.
Just to make sure it's me Pinky and not one of the 12 other ones, I checked other Pinky's stuff, and I'm pretty sure there's no connection, except through me linking, which I rarely do so our content doesn't get entangled. She has her thing, I have mine, we both happened to be grabbing web IDs at the same time without even knowing it, I wound up with the twitter, she got the pinterest, another Pinky entirely got the facebook, still another got the linkedin, and dang if there aren't just a slew of PinkyGuerreros taking over the world. But not like this weird link, that is NOT any of us. By the way, if you EVER see my name on anything asking for money, it is NOT me unless you also see it linked on my official dotcom.
I'm going to make a big bad guess that this is one of my *cough*botfollowers*cough* fans who just loves pestering Pinky blog hoping to get some attention. Well, here you go, you got attention. The whole world can see you bugging me and either pretending to be Pottsy or bugging him too or whatever the boink is going on, and dang if I'm not getting a heads up poking me to go see what you're doing. Who knows, it might've ALL been you, right? You're a genius, you need someone to notice.
click to use this yourself
Ok, here's the thing. I believe sometime, possibly in my lifetime, one of two things will happen.
1- Dirty nukes will take down grids all over the planet and internet will super fail and all the fun will be over.
2- World Order will seize control of the internet and synchronize all of us and all the fun will be over.
And that is why none of this bothers me. Whether I shut all my stuff down myself or someone rips it out of my hands and mangles it up, y'all have heard me say first I'm not too stressed about it since I was the one nuking my own stuff in the first place. So you guys in other countries making fake mes on facebook in Brazil or hijacking my youtube vids in Germany and China or hitting me daily with app smash links and page openers- I don't care.
But the real question is do I appreciate it? Yes, I appreciate being alerted third party that my name is being used to hijack an American site, thanx. Yes, I appreciate the fun little jaunt off into space I took checking it out because my day wasn't exactly bubbly and I was needing distraction, thanx. Yes, I appreciate being able to use this as content now because, honestly, I'm hitting a burnout wall and have been awfully cranky lately, and this kinda cracks me up, so I'm sharing, thanx.
But I'm mostly wondering if this was a homework assignment and I was chosen because you get real feedback or something, go tell your teacher to give you an A, and tell Putin thumbs up on the whole Trump and North Korea thing, I saw that coming months before it happened. Nice theatrics there.
The rest of you are stewing that I'm steering off into this instead of finishing that Mantrid post...
Burnout, guys. 7 weeks of Disney Jr in my house. I appreciate all the distraction I can get.
:edit: 5-25-17 And this is why I use a Torch browser. Excellent vid, sorry to see it taken away from the public.
Last big day of a very long month, including appointments with psyche guy and a surgeon follow up after PT and checking on a tiny little guy in his own very giant surgery, and I wake up in the night with pink eye...
Thank goodness I know what to do. I am a paragon of sterile fields and not touching anything. This is where I wish I had a pretty handkerchief to hold, like ladies used to in the old days. People see me holding a kleenex will think there's a booger on it. Wish I'd been a paragon yesterday. It's super tree season, I'm sure I rubbed my eye at some point somewhere between the chewable benadryls and the chiropractor and bank and tax guy and Walmart.
Sorry, got lost in the weirdest cat memes ever. That's right, you didn't know I was actually gone. Anyway, I couldn't choose just one and probably went about 300 deep, so it's going to be one of those days. Like Pinky brain with pink eye. Anyway, I stopped at this one. I come from these people and I'm the one who's strange with brown hair and brown eyes. However, I still sunburn faster than anyone I know, and yes, I'm a magnet for pink eye. I grew up with Hereford cattle, they get pink eye really bad, too. Dad always thought white faced cattle have weaker eyes. No idea if there really is a connection, but he worked on a cattle ranch in Gunnison and knows a LOT about cattle. And he also never got pink eye while the rest of us went down in flames. He came from the blond hair blue eyed people, but his beard was red. But I severely digress. I need more coffee.
I spent a delightful hour in a huge crack in multiplayer a couple of days ago. I might turn it into a dwarf mine like in LOTR and the Hobbit movies. It's developing stair cases and little highways and I'm getting tons of gold and emeralds, even ran into a few little diamond veins. Redstone and coal all over the place. A werewolf I'd pushed over the edge before I went down finally got me at the bottom, but I respawned and /back so fast that I got ALL my stuff back, and then I found him later in human form and vented all my wrath. I love the way they wimp around yelling "Hey, you're hurting me!" before they die. I almost feel like I need a special chest to put all their little wooden tools in, like trophies. Yesterday I started tunneling under an ocean. I'm going to see how far I can go.
Noticed somebody left the door open at the store... Hope nobody wandered around long enough to find a way into our house and take anything. I'm a little OCD about doors. I've nearly been killed in the store AND in the house a few times by some really crazy looking mobs, bcuz MoCreatures.
I'm starting to suspect that Kai lives for the surprises, life always on the edge, a sort of carefree YOL9, as a cat meme would say. I see only one YOL12, but they used Ten for it. Eleven approves...
I don't know if Dwight has ever played minecraft, but some of you have designed skins for him. Go you guys. I'm continually cheered up by other people who obsessively obsess about obsessing more than I ever have.
Scott's already using his sleeves to turn doorknobs just to get out of here and go to work. I bet he didn't think about touching the coffee pot handle MWAHAHAHAHAHA. >=D I wonder if he would believe me tomorrow if I tell him the eye doctor says we'll have to amputate my eye bcuz bad stuff. You know, April Fool's Day. I bet I got this from that stupid werewolf. Those guys never wash their hands. And you never know, maybe I just got a little redstone dust in my eye.
Wow, I haven't had a free association day in a long time. I'm out of practice. I used to love those.
Ok, leaving the house in a little bit, need a jam to pull my brain together around this ooze.
click to see on pinterest Reality is what we take to be true. What we take to be true is what we believe. What we believe is based upon our perceptions. What we perceive depends upon what we look for. What we look for depends upon what we think. What we think depends upon what we perceive. What we perceive determines what we believe. What we believe determines what we take to be true. What we take to be true is our reality • Gary Zukav
Perception colors what we think, how we think, why we think. Everything that came before and everything that still comes all gets channeled through a tiny locality of perception.
My mother introduced me to the theatrical arts. Everything I do now unwittingly started with her, a very very long time ago. A few people here and there have added their strokes, colors, shadings, even the sandpapers and acids. Three, especially, were catalysts for inspiration. One set my path, another set my future, and still another set my compass.
I like the graphic content better on this one...
In the beginning it was a string of little gifts- Danny Kaye, the soundtrack to Space Oddessey 2001, Tchaikovsky. I never told her I found Prokofiev. She tried so hard with me, against all the stupidities around us, and when even she thought she'd given up on me and all my sullen rejections, still never failed to keep gifting me with insight via the playwrights and storytellers, the music makers, and those who spent their lives in that service. But, like any robot, all I could do was collect and compile the data, and then stall out in stack overflow. For a long time I couldn't understand the whats or whys to her attempts.
Skip many years. Light bulbs came on. Stagnant data started processing. The whats and whys became apparent. I know now those attempts were pieces of her own soul sloughing off as she very slowly gave up her will to keep fighting, but was it too late? I was a special repository, an ark of particular ideas and dreams she didn't seem to share with anyone else. Why? I was quietly fed a very different diet from the other kids, rich with culture and aesthetics, but in such a way that I'm not sure anyone else knew what was going on.
...and the music better on this one.
So many perspectives. Every few years changes all the perspectives and everything gets reprocessed. More whats and whys, and she's not even here any more to discuss them, as if we could ever have discussed them anyway. Her insights were formed from her own tiny locality of perception, and like the singing beast of Perelandra, she couldn't understand why I couldn't stay in the same spot, seeing it the same way, without knowing the deeper reasons for why they exist in the first place. I can't just accept that things are the way they are. We grew further and further apart, and still she managed to keep pushing me away from the others into the only hope I had to survive. She pushed me out into the world, and I wound up in the very place my dad was horrified to see me- college. It occurs to me as I write this that maybe my mom found a way to checkmate through me, and she didn't even play chess.
Watching a child grow up a chasm away must have been so difficult. My head and everything in it was so alien to her, and I so effortlessly spent my life dismissing her as unimportant, immaterial, unneeded. I never missed her until I got grown up and had a child, never thought of what she must have thought or felt until she was nearly gone. In our entire lives, we never once had a meaningful conversation as far as I was concerned, although her anguish over my soul was apparent.
I'm not a bad person. I'm a terrible person. Bad people have misdirected motives. Terrible people have altogether different agendas. Bad people repent, or at least play along until they get what they want. Terrible people hang around and do the right thing, knowing that just being there inflicts pain, but ignoring it. Bad people at least lie. Terrible people don't.
How we see things, how we see each other, how we feel about what we see in our tiny localities all goes through a filter called a brain. My filter works a little differently. Why is this even coming up? Because the visits with my psychologist are rare nowadays, and I want to squeeze as much as I can out of every minute, so I dig into my head, sift through all the stuff I turn over, look for everything I can that still has me stumbling through whatever emotion I haven't smoothed out yet.
I assumed all this time I was never accepted as I was. Of course I wasn't. I never felt loved or forgiven. I know now that is an erroneous perception that came through the tiny locality of a different kind of filter. I didn't feel those things because I couldn't generate them myself. I couldn't need her, or care about her, not at first, not for many years. Over time I have learned these things, and with lots and lots of very awkward practice I'm even getting good at them. One thing I do know- Mom won. She may have lost the fight, but she won the war doing it. I wish my dad could see that and understand it, but he's like me, and he never had a mom like that, so how could he?
My mom was a mess. She was sneaky and angry and emotionally wrecked up, and she hid it so well for nearly everyone else. She found ways to survive being tethered into what was essentially third class role playing, even if she didn't understand that's what she was doing. She did her best to embrace what she thought was correct, but must have instinctively known I couldn't do that. This year looking back, my changing perspective is showing me that she gave me tools to help me learn to thrive intellectually, even if she didn't have a clue that's what she was doing. She did that part absolutely right.
The part of me that can finally share back what she needs from me is too late. I know she needed hugs and smiles and to hear that I love her, all of which I staunchly refused to do for many years, opting for conflict and openly mirroring back to her what she tried to hide from everyone else. I hated that our lives were a lie and a pretense and that she tried to make me wear masks. I kicked against the ropes, untamable, rebellious against thousands of years of socially acceptable behaviors, little knowing that all over the world others were doing the same thing. The world has changed so much in even the last two decades, and still changing. All over the world we can see each other now kicking against all the things that tie our souls down to mundane acceptance of drudgery.
Survival is always priority. Some TV shows ask us how far we would go to survive. I've been asking myself that for most of my life. Survival isn't just physical. Emotional survival has a huge impact on physical survival, we know that now. It's even common now to think of emotional health. My mother raised me in an era of stigma, and I know the pretense back then was the only way she knew to survive emotionally. As long as she pretended, she could keep a firm grip on a safety net. What made me so angry growing up was being able to see how precarious the safety net was- one wrong move, and they let go. Those on the fringes understood my mom, had private friendships with her one by one, while the others nodded and smiled. Just keep nodding and smiling.
All boiled down, I'm not a nodder and smiler. I don't play the games that keep me plugged into judgmental acceptance groups. I walk away when people tell me I'm doing it wrong, and I don't try to win their good graces.
I asked my mom once, What if whether people go to hell depends on whether or not we forgive them, like this is a test or something. If you knew you could keep someone out of hell simply by forgiving them for being wrong, would you do it? She thought for a bit and replied, No, because they're still wrong. That was the moment I realized how the forgiveness boat gets completely missed. God forgives 'sins', humans don't. Humans keep defining and redefining 'sins' and then keep inflicting each other with righteous indignation, for lack of better description. I then asked my mom how she would feel if she got to heaven and saw that wrong person there anyway. I saw the gear assembly lock up, watched her struggle a little to find a loop counter, and after a few more seconds wormed her way out of the conundrum (thought experiment) with something about it wouldn't matter, because God said this and this. I interrupted with But wouldn't you be happy that person wasn't lost to eternal flames? She actually said no, to which I immediately replied How can you be not happy in heaven? (Since by very definition, heaven is unending happiness.) What she couldn't see was her determination to keep drawing that line, no matter what, even though she was actually one of the kindest people in the entire town. Her belief system was so entrenched in drawing lines that she couldn't allow herself to step over the line and think about something differently.
So she pushed me over. Again and again and again. She quietly pushed me over so many lines, and she watched me go out there and be who she couldn't be- rebellious against the tethers of society, free to find and be myself. She didn't approve of any of it, no, but she is the one who pushed me out there, because I am #aspienado, and I would have serenely sat in a corner and been fine with the world not bothering me. I would have sat in my room away from everyone and everything and never done anything with my life beyond playing board games and collecting model horses and reading loads of books. My mom was an instigator. That was one of her favorite words. She didn't use it a lot, but when she did it rolled a little more fondly off her tongue than other judgmental words.
I think my mom would have been delightfully horrified over Pinky, for Pinky I have become. She always did love theatrical productions, the good guys vs the bad guys, the sassy women on screen that she couldn't be in real life, the heroic men who loved the women supporting them that couldn't happen in real life, the adventures and danger and winning the day. She gave me that. And all my life I've known the stories must come from somewhere. There really must be more to life than toeing a line and behaving and nodding and smiling. Like asploding the world.
She could never reconcile that gulf between the arts and real life, but she certainly tried. My mom was the closest example I ever saw in real life to anything like Mother Teresa (who was roundly judged for being in the wrong religious category), and while it was difficult to accept sometimes that she was there for so many others and not me, I did learn that with others she gained the reward of sincere gratitude. I never demonstrated my gratitude to her for anything. I spent my life blaming her for every little thing, like an #aspienado does, measuring how her intentions failed to out measure her faults.
Where is all this leading? (Really, I'm asking myself that. It's not a writing gimmick.) Because she pushed me out into the world, I learned to survive emotionally. Yes, it was very hard, but I wouldn't have been able to survive in the rigid box I grew up in, much less thrive. I am a destructive person, breaking illusions and smashing delusions all around me. No one can stand a boat rocker for very long. I would have wound up alone and very bitter.
I know a few might feel offended that I would dare speak for my mother, being the most antagonistic in her life, causing her so many problems and conflicts. I saw the dark side, the times she cried alone when no one else was around. I saw the frustrations when no one else knew, the pain she covered up and hid for so many years. She was so afraid to slip out of her precarious safety net.
My mom watched Existential Aspie leap off cliffs, and she never once told me to come back.
Note- it's hard to convey so many years of emotion in one post. Apologies if it doesn't make sense. I wrote it for me.
Little blue planet, big blue marble, Potatohoe, potahto...
click to follow this cool person
The point is we at least HAVE a planet to live on. Some people out there don't. No, I'm not smarting off. I'm just broadly saying plz to have a good day.
I know the suckage really sux sometimes. Wanna go hug those terrorists and squeeze those terrorists and call them George.
Love conquers all.
Actually made it to #latenightmovie Saturday, but wimped out about halfway through because I had been up since about 1 a.m. I've seriously got to start sleeping better again.
~couple hours later~
Ok, just got my #TWDLiveTweetReview snips done, racing the clock. Shower time, run out the door to PT...
This jam has helped me push through the last 24 arduous hours. I can do this. I woke up practically in #aspienado shutdown, so today is a real power through kind of day. Love you guys, be awesome.
I am Jawa, hear me prattle meaningless syllables. The translation for the title of this post is "Want to buy a used droid?"
@bonenado is the best boyfriend ever and my favorite boyfriend of all time. Yes, he got me a new phone. I'll help pay on it, but he up front 18-month'd it, plan and everything, so I'm carrying around a mobile office again worth more than all the jewelry I ever wore put together. Well, it's hard to tell because I got such good deals during red tag Kohl's employee super discount sales. But pretty sure because I'm not a bling and bauble kind of person. Here is a gold Samsung Galaxy S6 with a "Brilliance" case. (If you really want that case you can pay much less on amazon or even less on ebay.)
Tried to get it on Scott's Turbo w/o the flash
but he hasn't figured his phone out yet
Basically looks like asphalt or tiny chat
or 'spirkles' that Eskarina Smith could tell
weren't real gemstones in 'Equal Rites'
(I like rocks...)
This does NOT mean I'm gonna start DMing &PMing the world again. Smart phones apparently severely aggravate not only carpal tunnel but cubital tunnel as well. I can currently barely keyboard, much less hold my new phone for any length of time.
As you can imagine, my weekend turned into a controlled crash while the laundry and dishes piled up, so this week is about excavating my way out of the rubble and devastation. Since we're still in the middle of the nerve entrapment approach in physical therapy, I'm kind of floating around feeling useless while my arms REST. This feels exactly like the Bell's Palsy felt years ago the first week, when my face felt 'tired' because the 7th cranial nerve had switched off. My arms feel very 'tired'. My muscle tone is awesome, but I have definite nerve weakness, and nerves take longer to heal than any other kind of tissue. Freeing up nerve pressure is like when little kids pinch your fingertip real hard for about 30 seconds and then let go, there's a rebound wham that feels like your fingertip will explode as the pressure comes back off the nerve. Went through that with my arms last week, and there's really nothing you can do but wait it out. My arms and hands are the most overworked parts of my body, and they are pretty sure vacation is hell and want the nerve pressure back on so they can't feel all this crap. I keep telling them that's how my mother wound up with useless and curled up arms as nerve damage eventually led to muscle waste, but they're being ridiculous and demanding 50 hours of work today. I poured coffee on them and said Ok, go to it.
I have a very busy day/week/rest of the month (as, I'm sure, do we all), so I'm trying to pace myself. Even so, I think we're nearly set for Turkey Day, and I'm hoping we have a tree up and cards out by the end of the month. I'm still not sure how I'm doing this, but yay! Just using the KISS method and not worrying about anything. I'm going to take the new phone slow, which will be easy since I'm so used to not having apps at my fingertips, and definitely won't go crazy all over them like I did with the last phone.
By the way, it was hilarious watching the Samsung rep at Best Buy try to import my contact list. He couldn't. He tried everything. Remember when I said I thought my HTC Sense conflicted with facebook updates that stepped out beyond the factory default settings and froze stuff up so bad that I had to start dumping apps? I got down to stone age twitter (HTC) with no perks and stone age youtube that could only pull in vids uploaded before a certain date, and I've been used to that for so long that I'll probably keep living like that for awhile. Anyway, my point- I wrestled my phone so hard that I was able to keep squeezing last gasps out of it, routinely getting "You have 13MB of space left" warnings, and once I think it even got down to 8. So this guy is trying to do everything I did with app wizards, app wipes, app dumps, until there was absolutely nothing left to do and clearly there was actually some room to breathe, but I had that phone packed so tight reorganizing my space on it that the new phone couldn't communicate enough to send a command over for the old phone to relinquish a contacts list. My old phone was that close to utter fail, and I was still using it. Kinda like being in a nearly dead space station orbiting a planet and hoping rescue shows up before the orbit degrades into epic crash. So, yes, I'm manually inputting contacts by carpal tunnel hand, slowly, like once in awhile I stick another one in.
But hey, NEWPHONE.
:edit: ~later~ I know, right? You guys couldn't believe I didn't put this vid in. Here you go.
this looks like bluejacky's kind of place
click the pic for a review
I finally watched an Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. with @bonenado a couple nights ago and had an interesting convo at the end with him about not sharing fan feels, highlighted by holding the remote hostage and flipping a bird in his face. What triggered it was a micro second computer screen view of a torus immediately covered up with other graphics blipping through, and *bing* right back to the character faces. I got as much understanding out of that entire series in one micro burst of graphics lasting less than two seconds as @bonenado got plodding his way through weeks of episodes. A quick five minutes of high speed interrogation caught me up. The most exciting thing about that five minute convo? Aside from finally seeing nearly up to date actual SCIENCE THEORY on a scifi show (soooo tired of characters re-explaining 120 year old Einstein stuff, omg), Scott and I had a quasi-intelligent interchange about theory instead of characters.
Brain sex.
I like it hard and fast. That was a very satisfying five minutes. I think he felt a little used and abused, but I like a flush of color when I'm braining. (I'm making up for the bird flip with homemade apple pie today.)
If you wanna grab that pic up there for a wallpaper, go here, right click on the pic, then save. It comes in full size that way. If you go to the article first, it comes in tiny.
One of the reasons I don't keep up with ALL THE SHOWS out there is because they wind up dragging through so much character development that the really cool stuff, like *ideas*, kind of gets lost in all the yap and moodiness. I was glued to this ep because blue planet. They really did a fantastic edit on that, and I wasn't bored at all. I enjoyed every detail that went into creating that episode.
I'm a Ray Bradbury fan. The up and comers don't know who that is and how utterly inspiring he was. The blue planet episode reminded me of the way I felt reading his science fiction stories when I was a kid, awe-stricken with visuals.
So. Today. *ow*
This is from Graston technique- Soft tissue therapy breaks up scar tissue and adhesions. "This is the Graston technique, an instrument-assisted soft tissue therapy that breaks up scar tissue and adhesions around muscles, tendons and ligaments. Stiff, bumpy scars and adhesions, Liebowitz said, don’t expand and contract the way healthy tissue does, limiting movement and creating pain." One of the better articles I've found describing how microshredding fascia works to bring pain levels down.
You guys know I'm back in physical therapy pursuing the bounce off or bust it down wall thing. My therapist has already tried 3 different approaches in 2 weeks and I'm wildly rebounding off that wall left and right like a trampoline. She's getting incredible notes, though. On top of my basic chart full of typical severe fibro, now I'm getting words about just how bad in very specific locations. We are defining the wall. Kinda like getting sonogram of an ocean floor or something, takes time.
I'm at the point in therapy where I might not be able to keep breaking through, and really do need to submit to a stopping point before we trigger massive casualties. The goal of therapy is to bring pain levels down, but thanks to my insistence on aggressive experimentation, the pain levels have been spiking left and right, right? Part of mapping my wall is testing all the boundaries. After 3 visits, I think my therapist is deciding to sit on me until I stop struggling and start cooperating. The whole power through the pain thing isn't flying with her at all because she can see me actually making it worse.
She grew up on a farm, like me, and has really super strong hands. Boy howdy, I am getting deep tissue restructure like you wouldn't believe. (That doesn't sound awkward at all...) This is actually what she's doing. What Is Astym® Treatment?"Scarring can happen on top of the skin, but often the biggest problems come from scar tissue that forms inside the body around joints, muscles, tendons and/or ligaments. The body naturally lays down some scar tissue in response to irritation or injury. The fibrous, strong scar tissue is meant to reinforce an area, but often it ends up restricting movement and causing pain." It's a really good article, if you're interested. I'm basically a solid mass of scar tissue, and as we slowly shred, it's turning into what feels like tight guitar strings, and those eventually tear down into softer and softer tissue. It's kind of a shock doing too much all at once, the body has to deal with so much cleanup and rebuild. Some people bruise up all over, but even though I'm not an easy bruiser, it's still tissue shred and revamp and must be treated like any injury- HYDRATION, rest, protein, and proper stretching during healing, because if you don't do all that, you just wind up with more scar tissue instead of healthy fascia.
I know some of you think that's crazy, hurt to heal. I'll tell you something even crazier. I worked with a girl one year who was going through modeling school before she went to college, and on the advice of the school, went to a special surgeon to have her jaw broken and set to length specification, and guys, she was already stunning. I can't even imagine paying someone to break the hardest bone in my body in two or more places hoping it will make me more beautiful. I think of her every time I go through ASTYM. If she can go through her jaw being broken for a career, I can go through a little bit of tissue shredding to drop a pain level and regain some mobility.
ASTYM itself works really well on me, I just want to keep pushing through to get closer to 'normal' again, which probably won't happen. My body response is driven by the fibro dysfunction mechanism, and I'm starting to wonder if the aggressive scarring throughout the soft tissues all over my body will be a continuous thing to my last day. My mom pretty much just 'froze up' all over, and you can call it what you will through the stages, like nerve entrapment and whatevs, but in the end, muscles that can't move can literally calcify (I saw her shoulder x-rays), and the only way to keep it at bay is to keep moving.
Anyway, just touching base on the major suckage issues, yes, I'm in a buttload of pain last couple of weeks, but it's the good kind of pain, not the bad kind. All the same, it affects my personality, and I'm chewing on a bazooka like a toothpick. If I'm not talking to you on the twitters, it's probably a good thing.
Oh, let's see, need a productive jam to keep me moving. I cannot believe that scene with Oswald's mother. (I won't spoil it if you're behind.) Let's get some Oswald support going while I GET TO WORK! >=lFOCUS!!!
There are some youtube vids I generally avoid. The weird ships are ok, they mostly make for great protagonist forays with good action music since action/violent scenes lend such a good visual companion to sexual subtext, but the parent/child AU smashes are completely opposite and rather devastating. There are a lot of those. It's rather stunning to realize how well each actually understands the other when it comes to vid story construction, but still can't break out of whatever vicious loop they might have going in real life. Or maybe it's just that I so rarely stop and think about these things.
Yes, up at 1:30 a.m. again. I go in for 6-month psych follow-up (the one who prescribes and can't get me to commit to meds) and I'll have to come clean and say no, I'm not sleeping that great. Totally split shifting again for several weeks now. At least the total is still coming up to 6-8 hours in every 24. I'd so much rather just get up and move around and then go back to bed than zombie out solid and not be able to move in the morning.
So this was my first October in over ten years where I managed to keep some kind of real time cognitive involvement going pretty much daily without bombing into complete distraction to survive. No teeter-tottering through emotional shutdowns, no significant time disorientation bubble breaks, no angsting over a daily plan...
The daily plan thing is a toss-up. I feel like I'm bombing because the angst of stuff piling up is visible on my kitchen table, but even the least amount of reflection recognizes I'm easily keeping up with daily living nowadays as meals and chores and writing automatically happens without much conscious thought, much less having to create daily planning around them. Same with simple grocery shopping. I spent several years making elaborate lists of places to go, errands to run, things to pick up, and would still come home with it mangled up. It's nice being able to remember a few things now without having to write every little bitty thing down. Still, the daily planning was a very good habit, the root command under all the crawling back up the mountain stuff, but I think my conscious discipline is becoming an unconscious automatic routine.
Enough quickie psyche assessing. I'm stalled on the Mantrid post for good reasons. I've already spent every day in town this week, and not all of it over my own stuff. Bunny has something going on that we're watching, other people close to me have stuff, plus holidays and family birthdays and their baby stuffs have started popping in and out of scheduling, so I'm generally just not even on the computer much lately. I see several people are still wondering why I'm not personally responsive online, well, I'm actually functioning better in real life, so yeah, juggling 100 people means prioritizing and it's taking some of you a really long time to accept that. If I were a good cartoonist I'd create a panel visualizing calamities galore dive bombing all around and me holding a hand up and saying "Wait a sec, someone I've never met needs me online" while I'm bent over a failing phone or glitchy laptop. Social media is fantastic, I'll never say different, but the hilarious idea of aspienado being on-demand for people who've never met me in real life hasn't quite sunk into a few heads yet. My empathy is sketchy, and my time is extremely restricted. I apologize.
But you're blogging. You have time for blogging. But I'm not sleeping. I should be sleeping. If I'm up working on my own head/life stuff while I get through a pain problem that won't allow me to sleep, I don't owe anyone a pleasant conversation. I've spent incredibly long sleepless hours in the past online with people who were actually in hospitals or getting through other people being in hospitals, many hours logged keeping people company online sometimes right up to their last hours, and to grind my head back down to people demanding interaction of me simply because they are ~*~bored~*~ or restless (not being more forthcoming) kind of twists my head up. I'm saying this as kindly as possible to several people. The reason I'm public is so people can talk to me publicly. And having said that, if you do tag me, I can miss it because I'm tagged a lot, and if I still don't 'like' every single thing I'm tagged in, it doesn't mean I'm not paying attention or hate anyone. It just means I'm not going to slow down and hit the 'like' button a hundred times. In case anyone still feels left out or put off because I haven't personally acknowledged your presence lately, just wanna say you don't see anyone in my family complaining about me paying more attention to people I don't know than I do them.
Actually, kinda rambling while I listen to the latest SNews. Just put coffee on. It's about 3:15 a.m. now.
Ok, where was I? AU parent/child youtube ship smashes.
I grew up fantasizing having different parents. I imagined so many different scenarios and how many ways my childhood could have turned out. I've imagined having other kids, which I've discovered in 2012 is actually common for parents who've either lost or never managed to have babies or children.
Fantasizing relationships is a form of problem solving. It can get weird, yes. People can seem like creepers when they share what's going on in their heads. Exploring situations and conversations that never happened irl (in real life) is no different from imagining doing other things we either enjoy or don't normally do, like riding a horse or skiing or decorating a cake. Brains are pretty awesome for projecting scenarios.
But it's possible to get stuck in scenarios without resolving why one is there in the first place. Getting stuck in fanfictions, either in our heads or in actual print, without moving on to new or different material seems like a red flag. I've read some really excellent fanfiction, and I've tried writing some, but in the long run, I don't find it satisfying. I do find it helpful, but youtubes go way faster getting ideas across. I like the kind of anguish I can zip through, like ripping bandaids off with lawnmowers or something. I feel like I don't have time to slow down and lolligag around feels.
It hit me yesterday while I was driving around again (driving way too much lately) that part of my problem processing emotions in real time might be that it takes too long, so half the time I just shut it off. Emotions are really different from absorbing myself in technoweenie garble, a completely different kind of jigsaw puzzle. It's probably an apple and orange thing, like soduku and crossword puzzles. I'm not crazy about either one, but I'll take the crossword puzzle over the soduku if I'm desperate and there is no other distraction available. I think AU shipping vs real life is like that. Whether it's coworkers or significant other or family structure probs, it's just easier to turn to the distraction of puzzle solving scenarios than actual puzzle solving.
There are games that are never over. Chess and checkers definitely have an endpoint. Monopoly gets a little fuzzy, especially with rule-bending that allows credit. I'm a repeater, I like gaming for the fun of gaming, playing for the fun of playing, thinking for the fun of thinking. I think that's what the vids are, emotional game playing that never really has to end. Like soduku. It doesn't matter if you've solved a block, you just keep moving on for the sake of doing soduku.
I'm not good at feels, so I shut mine off and watch other people grind through theirs. I learn all kinds of stuff way faster than I ever did in real life. That SNews show I linked up there is the same thing, going over and over a scenario and outcomes, taking sides and leveling up in the debate arena with facts over something that is fiction. It's good practice, and provides interaction opportunities, just like shipping vids and twitter do.
Sooner or later, I can tell, I'll need to tackle the parent/child stuff. Since I've reached the point where I'm starting to deal with glitchy/missing memory stuff, this kind of struck me. There is more about the story setup in the youtube description, if you need it.
I have absolutely no interest in this pairing, nor the reason for it (back to regular shipping), but it's just a really well done vid story. A show we were watching on TV last night quite bored me for a long five minutes and prompted me to blurt that I never went through that poor me love stuff in high school (asexual aspienado's so facepalmingly aspie), and it hit me I'm sitting next to a guy who's managed to stay married to me for more than 20 years despite me so epic failing in the whole relationship department. This kind of video actually helps me 'get' stuff about other people that I otherwise don't normally even notice or go through myself.
For someone who doesn't get romance and can't flirt to save my life, much less even look like a girl half the time, I've been amazingly lucky. What really struck me about that last vid was the idea that part of the relationship revolved around a traumatic incident. Most of my life is one long traumatic mess of incident after incident, but I know that's not uncommon. What is uncommon is winding up in a successful relationship in spite of that. What's even more uncommon is having no idea how and having to look back to figure it all out.
I'm the sort of aggressive person who triggers into extremely destructive violent thoughts if I go into the angsty places too long (don't worry, just my style of fanfic shipping, if I had one), so it's time to spring back into the mockery I make of normalcy and get all over my day. I told someone earlier this week (or last, maybe) that I credit being pissy with getting me through the hard stuff, and since this week has gone a little further off the rails getting hard again than I projected, I wound up making another playlist to deal with it.
And if that doesn't do it for you, I like the softer stuff, too.
Yes, we all know I have an evil villain thing. My biggest obsession over them is that they all make drastic mistakes. That doesn't mean I can't love them and learn from them, though.
Unreciprocated love is all good if you still win the game.
Using people is all good as long as you enjoy them.
Your ringtone mirroring your psychosis is all good as long as someone gets it. (It's cool if you have to spell it out anyway, as long as you win the psychosis game.)
Putting all that together into finesse is just plain all good.
Brilliant game playing needs to be appreciated. That is the flaw. I can't tell you how many times I've yelled JUST KILL HIM at my TV. No, they always have to stop and explain what they're doing. See, it's not actual winning that they want. I mean, yes, they want to win, obviously, and they are powerfully motivated to do so. It's just that something else sneaks in and next thing you know, they're self sabotaging with all this talky stuff.
Real evil doesn't waste time talking. And it certainly won't stand there politely listening until you're finished making complete sentences.
Winning the game is useless if no one is left to listen to you when it's over. Or love you. Or admire your skillz. Winning is hollow and sad and empty after all the sparkles have been used up getting there.
That's why I am a loser. And I'm going to lose really really big.
On a side note, I was wondering why the heck I couldn't find a big bottle of real vanilla anywhere. This is a big deal because vanilla is the second most expensive spice in the world, and my very favorite. I've been known to pay $2 and more per ounce for the real stuff. Guess what- a 4 ounce bottle in my local Price Cutter is just under $10 now. It's nearly $3 an ounce right now at Walmart.
click to shop
You can check out price comparisons if you're interested. Yes this is laughably out of stock now, but it helps one appreciate what I'm talking about. ALL the big bottles are gone.
This says out of stock on one page but not on another. I've actually paid more for this stuff.
So. I'm buying store brand real vanilla because even though I'm super picky, I can't bring myself to hand over $5 for a tiny bottle (a few drops, if you think about it) of anything else. I'm sure I'll cave when this little bottle runs out because vanilla is one of the rare food pleasures I have left. I can still taste it properly (nerve damage) and I'm not allergic to it. (Hope I didn't just jinx myself.)
Vanilla is the kind of product that requires a hierarchy of evil villains to bring access to my area. (Well, according to some people, capitalists are evil villains, which I kind of embrace, and I'm sure there are a few despicable people/aspects to the whole industry.) The reason Walmart and Price Cutter are good is because it means I don't have to buy black market vanilla.
Yes, I'm spiraling down rabbit holes this morning. Nothing is organizing my thoughts beyond mild obsessions. Just worn out, I guess. I'm booked up in PT right up till Thanksgiving, so lots of running to town kind of stuff. I don't do sitting in cars well or lots of driving well. I commuted for so many years to college and work, 3 of those years were 60 miles one way. It's just not good when I go on autopilot while I'm thinking nowadays, I have to make myself pay more attention.
I'm struggling with evil villains. They're becoming too fashionable. Plus they've been so cuted up the last few years. Everyone loves a good villain, right? Actually, the whole point to being a villain is that no one loves you at all. Or if they do it's out of pure fear or their own psychotic weirdness, like the way Vigl loves Mantrid. Blurring the lines for family entertainment only creates a cushioned illusion for those not yet tainted with abuses in all their dark glories.
If that user or the vids there disappear now after sharing that on my blog, it'll only prove a point I made a couple of months ago. I don't care who's doing it, just saying that using me to hurt fans is lame. If this is a legal claim problem from a legitimate source, the least compensation could be reinvestment in new merch.
Moving on. Really having trubba moving on this morning. Another hour has passed, I'm wandering around the house. I have to leave in 40 minutes, egads. Need to get a jam on and walk away.
I didn't actually lay down on a Walmart bathroom floor (convo), but yeah, this was me in a Walmart earlier today drawing absolutely no attention to myself whatsoever. At least I hope I looked this cool.
It was hard to tell, but I think security kept an eye on me loitering around doing stretches all over my cart after it eased up enough to move around again. Associates kept sauntering by me asking if I was finding everything ok. Security used to have me do that at Kohl's when we watched people.
I'm the first person in Mercy therapy center history in the city of Springfield to bring in Diaper Doo in lieu of massage lotions, oils, creams... I was doing ok on shea butter up until last year, then one day my whole back exploded into this charismatic neon pink like I'd gotten third degree sunburns, and we didn't realize at the time that was my first really big latex reaction. Does Shea butter contain latex? Anything and everything with nuts and citrus has been out since 2011, so I've even tried emu emollients, but that actually kind of grosses me out since it's not much different from using goose grease in the days of yore, basically an animal had to die for the product. (Here, let us smear dead animal fat all over you...) What's nice about the Diaper Doo (thank you, Bunny, I owe you one for this) is that it's mostly lanolin from sheep wool. Keeping our fingers crossed, but so far so good, not even a hint of a reaction, which is awesome since I grew up with sheep and have had plenty of time to develop a sensitivity to lanolin. I pretty much smell like a sheep shearing barn right now, but I'm good with it.
(great, got stuck in alpaca memes, pack a lunch before you click this pic)
You know how last year I forgot to pick up Halloween candy? Remembered at the last minute today. It's getting easier to find Halloween candy that's gluten, peanut, and tree nut free now, mostly just stay away from the big chocolate candy manufacturers. Unless you have food allergies yourself or have or know kids who do, you have no idea just how scary Halloween really is. Bogus rumors still fly around about candy being laced with this or that drug or toxin, but no one pays attention to all the people who have to miss festivities because allergens float so freely amongst the populace and every surface they touch. Ironic, isn't it, that a death holiday really is a deadly holiday for some people. I think the scariest Halloween character should be Mr. Peanut. Click this pic for instructions on how to make the costume. I find it way more disturbing than a grim reaper clown smash.
My recovery goals are partially met- high protein lunch (tuna junkie), all over the hydration (plus hot tea, mmm), time to get a little nap (if possible), then bounce back up and make popcorn balls (I promised). Just finished putting a little pot of chili together.
I was looking for an Oswald Cobblepot Sherlock smash and ran into a bunch of Sherlock Clara Oswald smash. +_+ I like Clara, but I can't go there. I'll just stop where I'm at, it's horizontal break time.
Statcounter finally caught a referral from someone in Egypt that wasn't logged into google (being logged in gives the search engine user more privacy), and I'm pretty sure this older post is being randomly hit because of this search result, because it links to my page.
Translate gives me a G+ user name that isn't viewable except through the direct links on that G+ user search page.
This isn't the first time I've found my material pulled into someone else's religious or political feed/stream. My content being linked into that other stuff makes no sense since I have no other context and can't see the page it's used on or the comments people might've left. However, the hit count trickling in on that particular post is still so slow that it's hardly a problem, not like it's being bumped up into a most-viewed 30-day or all-time status. Yet. (Remember I found one of my chicken vids had garnered over 2000 hits without me even knowing it.)
Blog views are kind of like rolling dice, you can't really see who all is standing around the table watching you roll. There is a special kind of troll that lurks around watching for content movers and then attaches to them, and next thing you know, the search engines are crossing streams and pulling their content into other people's innocent content. It's an old game. I know it because I play it myself, I just do it out in the open and everyone can see all the linking and sharing I do. I don't make any money on clicks, but lurker trolls probably do, and some of them probably make a pretty good income on that kind of trolling. This guy is probably raking in some dough picking up other people's content and there's nothing anyone can do about it, at least from my standpoint, since I can't point to a specific place he's using my content, which looks like it's actually someone else's youtube content crossed with my keyword 'asexuality' and then posted in a protected (not searchable in the U.S. at any rate) stream hooked to heavy news content about (given what I can see) prostitution, drugs, and homoeroticism in a country that kills people for such things outside of strictly sanctioned 'law-breaking' in the name of religion. (You can see why my Zev vs Xev post was a big deal when you look at it this way. The keywords for your eyes opening are 'kills people outside of strictly sanctioned law-breaking'. Yeah, you're kind of getting that there's an oxymoron going on here...) (Can we all say "I worship his shadow....") (If you're not on the Lexx train yet and you think you're a big political activist, you really need to turn your head and start seeing the real world.) (Just saying.)
I have the option of blocking URLs in my Google analytics so the hits won't be counted at all anymore on those posts, so if a post ever does go really sour with bogey hits and I can't find any other way to make it stop, I'll just block that count from my accumulating overall total. I run into blogs all the time with ridiculously high view counts, and my first thought (especially if it's a boring post on a savvy monetized blog) is that they don't know how to cut out the spam, bot, and pingback 'views', which aren't real readers at all. Some realize that's going on and just blow anything outside of the U.S. off as generalized 'spam' and still fail to grasp how outrageously wacky their view count still is for something so boring, and they still don't take the time to go fix it, probably because they assume, quite wrongly, that a high view count makes them look really popular. To anyone who knows stuff, it screams robot.txt. The last thing I want to look like is a noob, hence, I check on my stat referrals. Constantly. (Believe it or not, this gives me a higher rating as a 'real person' on the internet. Yes, that's actually a thing they can measure for now.)
I never was one to cheat in games, either. I once played with a couple of kids who cheated at Monopoly and still beat them without cheating myself. I find cheating so tiresome. Cheating is quick and easy, and even if it takes a little bit of cleverness to not get caught, it takes much more cleverness to actually beat a game, and I'd so much rather be the second kind of clever, even if no one has a clue because I'm busy beating the game by being tricky looking stupid.
Anyway, the reason I keep digging is because I very much doubt I'm really that cool to be pulling in this many views lately, unless what I'm seeing really are a handful of new discoverers who are literally reading every post I've made (that has happened a few times), and possibly using the tagging system doing it because the visitor paths seem a bit jagged jumping around hither and yon. BUT, when I see the same path identically repeated 2 or 3 more times in short order, I can't help wondering if a string of bots are feeding on each other's trails. So I keep digging. (Yeah, totally got a visual of a web centibot, right?)
I do know from experimenting that the view count from my own mobile views is extremely accurate, as are a couple of other readers who've been regularly showing up in traffic for months. If I question a visitor trail, I just check the device and browser stats. Some bots can mimic that info to look like real people, of course, but patience and curiosity have helped me untangle several mysterious threads of clues and nail down actual people. I could care less who they are, I just want to know they're real and not bots.
What a boring post this is, huh? I'm killing time until the TWD live tweet. I've got chores done and there's not much left to do but snack, and I'm trying not to snack. I'd work on a project but then I'd bury myself and not pop up for air in time for the live tweet.
@bonenado leads a much more exciting life. I keep telling him he should blog. You guys would love his rants and rambles. And he's way less wordy than I am. And super dyslexic so the typos would be hilarious. You missed the sprint from the window after he saw an armadillo and zipped across the house out the door across the yard and back again because he was foiled by the basement door already being locked and he couldn't get to his pitchfork or shovel. I just said I don't wanna know about it. It's like living with a super bored action figure wound up to spring.
Ok, need a brain cleanser so I can dislodge my eyeballs and go get jammers on and get ready for the live tweet. Let's see, something fun...
Today's post brought to you by the awe-inspiring riddlydiddly song. Well, it's more like a mind-sucking vampire song, because I'm feeling pretty blank.
All my phone apps have folded up and died one by one until I finally completely lost twitter during the Emmys, even the HTC factory default, which was like being back in Bedrock. I need to start emergency backup on lappy, too, so I guess I'll pick up another flash drive and just start cleaning everything off.
TECH PURGE. Me and content excavation irl.
This is getting super pinned all over my pinterest.
Pinklectic.
I get off on articles like this. I love word construction for the sheer sake of word construction.
We all know how powerfully emotional and mental pain affect the arts, I want to add works molded by the powerful effect of physical pain on chemicals in the brain. My whole weekend was necklectic.
One of my favorite stories growing up was The Elephant's Child. Ironically, I was spanked fairly often, pretty hard, and sometimes for a long time. I come from two very different long lines of people who both believed in spanking. Children were to be broken so they could learn to obey. Like a horse. Like a dog. Like a slave. Like an upstanding pillar of society. Like a model citizen. Like a good fill in the religious blank.
Love and pain are a very entangled concept to many people in the world. Love is pain. Pain means love. That's why striving for heaven and nirvana and whatever else in an afterlife is so seductive. While jagged pieces of the world struggle for domination, I struggle with the power of word construction, bending my will toward the seduction of breaking all these stupid chains. #aspienadoI want to break the world. Therein lies a villainous pun.
Yeah, you know this is just a time filler while I wait for my PT appointment, which is pretty early this morning.
Google webmaster tools makes me wanna stuff chocolate into my eyes. I mean, I've had it set up for a couple of years because I beta tested something they were doing, it's not a horrible mess or anything, but I think I finally got the Brazil thing figured out on my dotcom. I think someone somehow shared access by setting up a ping thing, conduit hijacking seems to be the new rage.
In the meantime, I'm seeing my Lexxperience blog show up in rankings for stupid things like "Damien Puckler biography", and how in the world do "Torri Higginson" and "Verizon ecard" searches lead to Lexx??? Seriously- "Max Von Sydow children". I think "Armand Assante" just shows up everywhere in general. Not sure how "Belinda Carlisle" pulls Lexxperience up faster than "Xev Bellringer real name". Somehow got associated with "vintage G.I. Joe figures". But back to Lexx! The top ten searches included 6 variations on Zev/Xev, Patricia Zentilli actually came in 2nd, Lexx Bunny, Lexx the dark zone, and Jeffrey Hirschfield. I think my favorite search phrase was "my idea of fun is killing everyone".
Here on Pinky, the top search phrase is "treenahasthaal". Not. a. clue. (Ok, that's actually a twitter account that doesn't even follow me, but somehow leads to a ton of my images in search if you scroll down a little.) Second one is, not surprisingly, "Nixa Sucker Day 2015", but third is "banana bwains". I actually rank a 4th search position for "Candyland board game" and 31st for "zombie immunity". No idea how "Timmy Cappello" pulls me up. This is one crazy blog. (Keep in mind these are all Google search, other search engines might rank my content very differently.)
My dotcom is all but dormant and has 14 pages of search phrases pulling it up (20 per page, you do the math). Pinky only had 3 pages and I'm here all the time. I guess no one's looking for Pinky-me out there because you're all in here with me already. I should be serving cocktails and passing around nibbles.
Anyway, the phrase "Lisa Marie Bowman" hooked my dotcom 13 times, high fives and knuckle bumps #SyfyDesigns. Yeah, I linked those so you can go check her out. My fave search phrase pulling up my dotcom is 4 inquiries for "the spider who never gave up", ranking 24th-49th, so I'm well associated with vague spider issues. My second fave search phrase is "when robots go bad".
This was me staying out of @bonenado's hair for awhile. I'm super talky again for some reason, he's needing some quiet time with his ball teams and TV shows. Still haven't found that video camera. I've been falling all over the house behind him laughing myself silly about all the things we've looked for because he puts them in a 'special place' so no one will find them, and he's the one they stay hidden from. (He had to have been a chipmunk or something in a past life.) Since we found his phone in the fridge the other day, we've actually looked in the big chest freezer and several other places you'd never dream it could be. I can't wait till it turns up, this mystery is pulling me into his obsessive wandering around looking through things ten times.
I heard Bunny had no cavities, yay!
Batman is on tonsillectomy countdown. He's chill.
If they ever invent t-shirts with built in screens and sound, I want this video all over me playing on a loop.
