scary thorough

I didn't make this, but I screened this pic.
Click the pic to go to server news update post with much better pix.

Clearing out my calendar this month as I get ready for the tuck and roll. Kinda feels unreal.

Aaaaaaaaaaand the Christmas decor is already up, lol.

I'm already making room for a couple of trees in my house. Papa's Vikings tree will be in the livingroom by the TV. Bunny's kid tree will be in the dining area bay window by the kitchen.

Speaking of football, total facepalm last night. Around 7:30 p.m. @bonenado goes "You didn't set your team, did you?", which screeched me to a frozen halt. I should have been on that, what *looks at invisible watch*, 3 days ago??? I mean, I'm on a fairly solid losing streak anyway, so maybe it wouldn't be too bad, right? So I asked how bad it was and he said I had 6 guys on byes. ##SUPERFACEPALM Ok, so maybe I just look negligent. I asked who I was playing this week, and he said Tony. I. about. died. My first thought was Oh no, it's going to look like Pinky Robot threw the game on purpose to the boss because #internetcrushhistory, and @bonenado said Yep, totally.

Facepalm.

So I have absolutely no dignity this morning. Just drinking my coffee sideways through facepalm.

*sigh*

Now puns are spinning through my head. I really dropped the ball on that one. Etc.

BUT I'm all caught up with Shannara Chronicles, The Flash, Gotham, Walking Dead, Dirk Gently, South Park, and I'm sorry, Tosh, I made an executive decision and decided that I just can't be the superfan any more. I have seen everything digital Tosh has done up to something like 16 shows ago, but something's gotta give, and my timer is loading up with PJ Masks kind of thing. It was a good run. We'll always have the show with all those people doing an exercise machine marathon, and the show where you dressed up like a Ken doll for the human Barbie. *weeping* I've gotta stop before I lose it and go get that timer back.



My only plans today are to keep the ringer on my phone on so I'll get scheduling calls, chip away at some more of the piles in my room while I do the daily dishes and laundry, menu plan some kind of supper, and rip another mesa down in Mo Creatures before resource gets reset. I expanded my player shop into colored and glazed terracottas this fall and I am slamming through clays like you wouldn't believe, on top of smelting chestloads of glass blocks and restocking ALL THE WOOD PRODUCTS. I'm a machine. I should take a little time and sell some more farm harvest, kinda blew about $300,000 this weekend on player shops and coal restock, and currently talking to someone about purchasing a flying bigcat, so I need to pump back up to my $2M before I blow it back down too far.

I'm not done yet.


I've still got things to do.


There's always a reason to go on. I just noticed the time on this. Kinda like that other time. Seems to happen a lot around here.

Bubba Guppy

click for more demotivational posters

I feel like I'm living a groundhog week or something. The deja vu is real, my Matrix is glitched, and the minutes and seconds, Best Beloved, feel like eternities. I've felt this before, kinda like I'm near the end of a strangled euphoric episode. The med control is really slight, the main goal is to keep me eating and sleeping regularly and so far I feel like it's been fairly controlled. I first mentioned this one on the fourth, so that's a pretty long euphoric ep. After spending nearly all of 2017 slowly crashing off pain meds and then switching a BP med, this month has felt like a huge relief and I think I'm overdoing and super wearing myself out. Fibro and euphoria are funny bedfellows.

And of course we're watching Bubble Guppies while the rest of the scifi world catches the new Star Trek series premier. I'm not bothered, just laughing because Bubble Guppies. I would never have known there was such a huge meme world going on out there on children's programming if I weren't living it myself.

But mostly I'm still just really tired. Guys- I TOOK A FOUR HOUR NAP TODAY. Well, I got only 3 hours last night, so that's not terribly unexpected, but I'm already ready for bed again and it's only 7:30. That's a good thing.

In the meantime, my fantasy team is a joke around my house. I benched Gronkowski because groin injury and big ol' orange notification saying he wouldn't be playing. He pulled in 18 points today. I'd take some comfort in Cooks' 44 points, but Mandie's team is over 100 points ahead of mine and there is no way I'll be catching up. I'm trying to feel horrified but I keep giggling at how much this is bothering @bonenado. He wants to get in there and fix my team so bad...

My internet has been so fantastically slow and on/off/on/off all weekend that I tossed Mo Creatures to the winds and played singleplayer. I couldn't even keep my realm pulled up for more than 2 minutes at a time, so trying to get on server would've been a waste of time. In singleplayer I'm not under any pressure to keep my player shop up, so I have felt exceptionally free to think through a few build basics, and like I pointed out, a real article appeared, so I wonder if backing away from my player shop would be good for me this fall, although it's been great for more brain building. I'm getting so good now at automatically organizing and remembering that I managed to pull 3 major autopays through my bank this month without getting into trouble overextending. That's a first. I usually nickel and dime it all out over the year, but this year has been one big thing after another, and it piled up. Well guess what. Player shop was good for braining and I fixed my real life stuff. MONEH.

click for fun pinterest stuff

Well, looky that. It's 8:15 and my whole family has already crashed into bed before me. I guess they're worn out, too.

I've been torturing myself with Sherlolly vids last couple weeks. Not sure what's up with that.


Ok, there should be a law against that kind of melancholy. Let's find something else.

flunking the draft

Mock if you must, but I love live drafting with @bonenado. It's hilarious and I do stuff just to fall over laughing while he pulls his hair out. My report card this year is rock bottom of the entire league.

I'll share my fave lines from the report.

With Some Early Gambles, 790 Should Call Chip Kelly for Trade Advice
Draft Summary
Despite selecting in the top half of the first round (sixth overall), 790 might as well have been blindly heaving darts at the draft board to decide their picks... 790 should look into the joys of scrapbooking, or bird-watching, or just anything that isn't fantasy football.

Meanwhile-

Yeah, not a clue. These are all new visitors coming in. That blog was 3 years old last month, has only 90 published posts, and only 4 this year.

Labor Day grillfest this year is ramping up. Twink has been on a Daniel fast for the last 3 weeks and is ready for some MEAT. Sunday we'll be firing up the grill and loading it with filet mignon, BBQ chicken and pork, and possibly shrimp. I figure may as well get it all cooked up and then not have to cook for a few days.

Bunny's arm cast came off yesterday and ceremoniously went into the trash. Nothing like starting school in a cast.

Between Scott's work finally selling, my kiddo and her Batman being in the middle of Houston (now harboring storm fugitives), and Bunny flipping our schedules with pre-K, basically our lives lately... I've got a full agenda today, so see ya.

last of 2016 30 day challenge- Day Nine

Week 14 in #SnarkFF and even with tweaking I'm projected as the underdog at only 30%. I've got more trophies than my opponent, though, ha!

Still holding 8th place overall in the league. I actually rank 5th in the league for earned medals, so at least I'm one of the more spectacular losers.

Yeah, I like the bomb one, too.


Sadly, the only thing my team has made it into the league record book for is the smallest margin of defeat, but at least it holds for the entire season and not just one week. My consistency as a loser pretty much means I make sure my opponents are forced to run just a wee bit faster than me. People do hafta work to beat me.

@bonenado, on the other hand, is still 1st in the league *rolls eyes*, but he's second in medals earned *lol*.

Yes, married to obsession. I've discussed his recycling habits with my pscychologist. I once experimentally dumped wet coffee grounds over something I threw away, followed by pouring old cooking oil over it, and found out later the thing I buried had still been rescued after the trash was carried out of the house. That's when I knew it's probably better to capitulate (because I'm actually not a mean person when it all boils down, although I could have kept running experiments). I now ask before I toss. I'm surprised we have trash to haul out at all, after all the places @bonenado goes to dropping off a variety of materials that can be reclaimed.

It's funny that we don't fight over this. He's almost secretive with this compulsive obsession, just quietly dogs away at it, so I'm coming to realize it's his stress reliever. If you feel like you have no real control over your life (his work place is listed for sale for 3 years now, he has a kid/grandkid bringing all kinds of chaos into our lives, and dreams of retirement started fading long ago), you can still rigidly control the trash leaving your house. If you can't save the Titanic from sinking, at least you can clean it up a bit while it's going down. If this were more self-tortuous I'd be very concerned, but since it's his way of feeling like he left some good in this world (like my blogging, I imagine), then it seems to be a healthy way of dealing.

Well, we did have a cranky session about a boat yesterday. He's always wanted a little one to go fishing, he keeps putting it aside for other things, years have gone by, it came up in a passive aggressive self defense maneuver, I said GO. BUY. A. BOAT. (we really do all want him to just go get one), and he just came stumbling out from a nightmare about being in a little boat on the Mississippi River and it getting caught in something and being dragged and stuff was going all wrong and he couldn't free the boat and he thought he was going to die- THAT is a stress dream. And since it came hot on the heels of our convo yesterday, yeah, STRESS DREAM.

We've got to take my car in this morning for oil change and transmission fluid, so I've already got the bacon done, and now that he's up, I've gotta get eggs done and jump into some clothes.

This is my fave stress combo. This is for @bonenado today.

post post title here

Mel and I exactly tied at one point last night.

She's got a tight end left, I've got a wide receiver and a defense. I'll try to be gentle tonight.

Ok. Twitter and Facebook, looking at you guys. People actually telling, no- commanding people they've known a long time to unfollow if they didn't agree on candidate. I can't tell you how many times across accounts I saw this happening, so I'm not picking on anyone, but I feel a disturbance in the force. Lemme help you.

• You have a block button.
• You have your own unfollow button.
• You have a mute button.
• In some cases (thank you, Facebook), you even have a "I'd rather not see posts like these" in your settings.

Venomously telling people to unfollow you regardless of history or length of relationship is idiotic, stupid, shallow, mean, and completely undermines whatever faith in humanity motif you feel you represent. You know, in case you wake up sometime before holidays and wonder why old friends or family are no longer talking to you.

By the way, Snarkalecs win the internet. Brava on actually making the debate funny.

Moving on.

@bonenado's new ride. 80K, 10 years old, nearly perfect interior. Well deserved. It's about time he gave himself a break.

And these guys.

Most years it's ladybugs smothering our house, this year it's pine processionary caterpillars (beware that link, I had to cancel an auto download, but it's an excellent study), and the really stupid thing about them is that the hairs can pierce you like porcupine barbs and can cause rashes and eye irritation, and even allergic reactions, which we all know would be really bad for moi. Hundreds of them are all over the ground, my front deck, and around my door, and just picking up a box UPS dropped off meant having to roll it around knocking caterpillars off all sides without touching them. They are creating the most prolific 'bagworm' year we've ever seen (bagworms are something else entirely), and it's actually visually pretty because it's so saturating that it's creating a pleasing balance across the landscape.
8 of the cutest toxic caterpillars

In other news, we're all asking, "Where is autumn?" Looking at watches. "It should have been here by now." This year is just weird. We've had fast autumns where the leaves all go brown and drop in one week flat, gorgeous autumns that suddenly vanish after one stormy night, long staggered autumns where the trees are confused and slowly realize 'oh', but this one is the first time I've ever seen #allthetrees forget to turn. Next week is traditional peak, and people are going, um, wanna plan an outing around autumn peak, not sure how to do this...

rub some bacon on Doctor Strange

Written late yesterday afternoon. Skip if you hate anything stats.

I think my favorite thing about statcounter is that it'll totally believe everything about you is in another country, including your hardware and software equipment and hosting and user service, and then blandly point blank say incoming from this city and state in the U.S. that is completely unrelated to Mountain View Google, Facebook, or any other massive bot referral masking system, and then I know the user manually adjusted the IP to look out of country. If everything about the IP is too matchy, that's a mask. A normal person with the usual stuff can ping up to 5 IP locations hitting a page because everything your system uses from hard drive to wifi IDs with its own ping, and out of country using almost anything chrome or google and especially a translator pings through Mountain View, and then Facebook has a couple main locations that I know is FB routing the ping before I even see referral address. Anyway, I waited a few weeks to see if this would happen again, because one day they got a little Pinky happy and I didn't wanna scare them off, but I guess not.

So here's what happened. They thought they were masking, but their corporate network pinged and I was able to easily look up that corporate HQ street address and phone number in the heart of Orange County, so this whole "I'm from Canada" thing is stupid. Also, it kind of looks like they might have bids out to national defense gigs, among other things, so basically I think I'm looking at players covering a hacking organization with a security front.

By the way, a Brazil association also came up, other people discussing this in forums, so another clue for the ol' Pinky List. I can't help wondering if this is how and why all these account compromises you hear about with banks and host servers and stuff keep happening. It's like inside jobs from super spies setting up sabotage wait I mean corporate strategy services and bidding out jobs.

Or it could still be this pissy head cold and I'm reading way too much into a few little numbers. You know, because weird. That's all, it's just weird. But I srsly feel more comfortable about Pinky blog being linked through a few porn sites in several countries and Ukraine bots crawling my pages than I do about pretend I'm from Canada while I ping your blog over and over for no rhyme or reason thing. Actually, kinda miss those Ukraine bots. I wonder what happened. Maybe they got bored, or my site mapping got too overwhelming, bcuz over 700 posts now with a million links. Or maybe someone got caught... o_o awwww.

Today.

I've already got 36 points from LeGarrette Blount in Thursday's game, woot! Week 3 in #SnarkFF (Snarkalecs Fantasy Football) and I'm up against Mandie, who has a fun fashion blog at pinkhairfloosie.com that I enjoy checking out. Click her pic to see lots more.

The swan thing at the top clicks to the facebook convo, also made an earlier tweet. Still not sure why that called to me, unless it's a retro design triggering a childhood memory of somewhere I've been.

So, MacGyver last night. I wanna say it was awesome, but I was still able to tweet through it, so it's on awesome-reserve. I'm more on edge with South Park's new drama this fall as Skank Hunt's 'reign of terror goes global'. Honestly, I had missed seeing this last ep when I wrote my troll post, had no idea how perfectly timed that was. If I had seen it before I wrote that, I'd have used South Park memes instead of those other ones. Love me some Dr. Ken. I think that entire cast is fantastic. We actually dropped a scifi show for Dr. Ken, so that's saying something. Superstore is our other laugh candy. Dina is my spirit animal, very well played by the stunning Lauren Ash. I may hafta keep track of her for some memes in my future. The real star with us this week is the new Lethal Weapon series. Not very many drama movie series get me hooked, but I'm a hardcore everything Lethal Weapon fan, and I thought they did an outstanding job casting and filming and getting that story rolling again.

No idea how I'm going to keep up with all the TV coming up. There's too much. I'm sure we'll be running behind a lot of it like last year.

Twitter is my Jag, lol.


I think we might have the weekend off, and now @bonenado's got this head cold from hell and sounds terrible, poor man. He poured maximum strength mucinex into his coffee IV, and you've gotta know he's not a meds man AT ALL. If he's taking something? ~*~it's bad~*~

In case you're not aware of this yet, very cool.


I so cannot wait for this movie. I'll probably have to wait forever for it to be released to Dish and DVD. There's a martial arts in film review directly after the trailer. I studied Jackie Chan's Drunken Master frame by frame and behind the scenes diaries, just brilliant.


That's right, I have absolutely no agenda today. I'm blabbing on about not a whole lot. I need to peel off here and go cook some bacon. This is for @bonenado's head cold.


df :edit: ignore that, it's not code for anyone, just a place holder after a bunch of html that I forgot to wipe.

sliding into my DMs like

I'm just now looking at my fantasy team this week. Looks like my guys are done. Uh-oh, looks like Jim has one player left tonight. I could still yet be toast.

Mold count in Spfld is over 45,000 already. My sinus is on fire. Hello, autumn flood season. Wait, we have an autumn flood season?

O_O !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was looking for a demotivational poster for autumn and ran right into this. My brother took that pic, and I know because he took it several years ago on his property and used it as a cover on his music site back then, and I told him it was a really nice pic and he told me he took it himself. Incidentally, when you click this pic back to source you can see the date this poster was loaded, which is 2 weeks after our mom died. I looked through the user posts and found out the birthday month is different, so my brother didn't make this. You can see the same landscape in a post I wrote that included a pic from one of his kiddo's wedding reception.

The synchronicity is strong this morning. *gets more coffee*

Busy week coming, gotta rock out the door every day till Friday, and I'm not holding my breath on that one. I will say one thing. Any man who gives a woman crap during a severe post partum crash is pure selfish, and meemaw is pretty pissed.

Although it goes against my better judgement and experience to keep promoting other people's junk, this slid into my DMs and now it's your #mondaymotivation. I'm not endorsing this person, but yeah, this is about where my head is right now.

paint you by numbers

~Yesterday afternoon~

+_+  *ow*

We've been doing deep tissue nerve work up and down my spinous processes. Nearly everything I'm feeling all this afternoon can be summed up in "shoot me now". This graphic clicks back to a very detailed and absorbing page if you feel a sudden need to bone up on the spine. Don't judge me.

Right now I feel like my little minecraft avatar looks like when it falls off a cliff and smashes on the rocks below. Hufda. The actual therapy wasn't terrible, in fact it felt pretty good, and I left feeling much better than I have been lately after this kind of stuff. We're getting super specific in what I'm fondly visualizing as recoding nerve input and output. There is a series of pressure points several different ways up and down both sides and on my spine, some of it feels pretty intense but none of it actually feels worse than what I live with, but any kind of deep tissue work leaves a person feeling a bit beat up for a couple of days. It's part of the retraining and healing process, helping the various tissues either break down and rebuild differently or become more maneuverable or cut through nerve chatter and redirect it into more effective nerve communication. So far it's changed quite a bit of numbness, tingling, and maddening itching I've tolerated for years.

~Today~

So much better. *sips coffee*

Last time I was on moc I finally got a wyvern to hatch, and a super mod showed me how to make it stay and feed it. I heard on the new moc we'll get ghost wyverns, awesome. I'm also playing with natural tree walls and roof camouflage while I'm out on the ocean. Pretty sure my new moc home base will be on a very lonely ocean far away from spawn point.

Also found a few more signs had been changed in the store.

Last night was our first fantasy league match up. I had a decent start. My defense could have been better, but I probably jinxed them bailing early to go to bed.

I mention once in awhile why Doctor Strange will be so big to fans around the world. This sums it up for me personally, and I imagine anyone with any kind of nerve disorders or injuries will plug into this concept. The idea that we can still be powerful in our minds is very important. When you click out to this tweet you can see each pic better. Whole lotta work went into those hands.

Ok, I found it, very long post about using back to school to refocus my daily life, but scrollscrollscroll finally gets you here.

I remember seeing Dark City the year I was in the worst of being so terribly ill that I needed assistance with everything I did. I couldn't tie my shoes and had to go velcro, couldn't dress myself, couldn't drive, and every bit of it was nerve fail. You do not know when something will cause any kind of system fail in your body. Surviving it and then healing from it was far more than I dreamed could happen, because it certainly felt like it was killing me, but I hung onto things like this.


That was a rescue vid, by the way, I didn't make that. I think it disappeared and then reappeared here, but I don't think that was original creator unless it was an account wipe and recreate, but it seems really incongruous with the other vids uploaded there. I originally used it in a post on Bluejacky in 08 or 09.

It's all about consciously deciding to keep using what you can of your mind to survive and change your circumstances, or at least your point of view. Ultimately, spoiler alert, it was about the doctor, not the main character John. I find myself wondering sometimes how many resets that doctor helped initiate before he successfully broke through and won over the parasitic occupation of human hosts. Imagine being the only one who knows the why behind everything, and not even sure if that's even a concrete reality, and very slowly running these agonizing experiments on other people without ever being able to confide in anyone or have a friend. The tool scraped together everything in his power to create his own tool, and that was John. Right up to the end it was about secretly hanging on to believing that what he was doing was the right thing.

Fans on youtube saved me in the dark when I had nothing and no one else out there. I will never forget that. Fans are more important to me than the shows and actors themselves, other little lights out there in the dark, living real lives, finding ways to cope and focus and keep going. I cannot wait to see the fanvids that come out of the Doctor Strange movie. Interpretation is an art form I cherish in everyone around me.

Ok, I'm waxing way too poetic for predawn, I need to decide what I'm doing today. @bonenado will be back home early this afternoon to pick me up for eye appointment because they'll be dilating, and then I get to walk around Walmart half blind in my funky new blackout sunglasses from China, woot! Let's see- yes, I annoyed someone with this one on twitter yesterday, BWHAHAHAHA.

Lyrics

moves like Peyton effing Manning

Hour of stretching, warm up, and workout so I can bend- check

Kaspersky accidental double account disentanglement drop off and auto renew- check

#SnarkFF lineup set against @PinkHairFloosie- check

Fed @bonenado BIG BREAKFAST in between his zipping around in high speed because his fantasy baseball team (baseball has been on the TV for 2 hours already this morning), 4 fantasy football teams, two survivor pools, a national pick the winning team for a vacation to Hawaii lotto, and still needing to activate RedZone (omg & get a free week!), and crunch time because we don't know if Bunny is coming over- check



I love autumn. Every weekend is like a party/holiday. This clicks out to a nice wallpaper/theme site.

Last night was a riot. The movie is totally worth going back to just to watch the closed captioning, which is so way off that between the gang snarking in chat and the crazy weird translation gaffes, I couldn't stop laughing the whole time. I've got this set as my wallpaper now. Click for full size.

I'm not going to be able to be a sitting down person at all today, so this is it, if you don't see me on the twitters or elsewhere, I just gotta keep moving.

the #bencongruity of lambs, lollipops, and goth spaceships (pre-coffee)

Kinda facepalming over my Ben booty post rocketing into the top 5 in 5 days flat. I feel like a pimp. But my spaceship post nearly wiping out everything else makes me feel better, so I'm ok with naked Ben popping my eyes out every time the stats open up. It's 4 a.m., haven't had coffee yet, that sounds suspiciously porny. I'll let it off with a #Bencongruity warning. That's my new thing. (Never do a general search for 'goth spaceships', btw. +_+)

We're sweating it this week. Scott's boss called a meeting for next week and here we are right on the brink of asking a bank for a roof loan. We're crossing our fingers it's not a sale announcement now, since we've been teetering on that brink for going on two years. We're staying calm on the outside in an inner monologue what if  kind of way, keeping our freaking out to ourselves so we don't have a double meltdown of freaking out and then me killing people. Metaphorically. Thank goodness #SnarkFF is starting back up for distraction. Yeah, I dropped to 5th place. @bonenado thinks I should let go of the Manning brothers. My mental struggle over this conflict of interests keeps my mind off other things.

Hey, we found the video camera! Well, Scott's mom found it buried in a closet at her house. It got left behind at Christmas and she put stuff away and Scott's brain slowly ate holes in itself trying to find it until he was nearly convinced Alzheimer's R Us now.

I was musing on my book title being not very unique since 'existential' seems to naturally come up in aspie/autie discussions anyway (which I wasn't aware of when I chose the title several years ago), but I ran into this gem on a hilariously inappropriate forum thread. I love it.

Q:DO AUTISTIC PEOPLE EVER EXPERIENCE EXISTENTIAL CRISES?

A:The eccentricity is a coping mechanism for the never ending existential terror they experience. You would think trains are bitchin' too if everything else in life was a spiraling black pit of meaninglessness.

I mean, perzackly. THAT. Because this has been my fave Calvin and Hobbes strip for over two decades.

My problem is the nonbeing part. Too many people assume we might feel relief upon release from this life, and my argument put very simply is that we cannot feel relief if we are not there to feel it. These and many other quandaries will be showing up in a book ridiculously overflowing with shocking personal experiences. I say shocking... Some of you will be dizzy by the end between feeling sick and embracing the warm fuzzy world hug.

Speaking of horrors, who knew that prehistoric Americans used ragweed ceremonially and medicinally??? O_O The pic clicks to more ragweed info.

So, existential incongruity. Oh, I'm going there, skipping gaily as a lamb through a slaughterhouse.