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Monday, August 31, 2015

all my best pix are taken in bathrooms

Today is kind of my very last assessment day for one year on this blog, and I can't think of a better way to celebrate and thank you guys for clicking my links than to dig up my bathroom selfies and maybe find out the stories behind them.

Before we start, first of all, I never dreamed this post would hit all time top. Ever in my wildest dreams. I'm blaming whoever is in the Ukraine. Ok, and the rest of you guys, too.


(Explanation: it was originally an Easter egg post and exploded once people found out it was there.) (But you still don't know the answer to the riddle behind the pun.)

Second, I really am blown away by the view count. I've done everything in my power to weed out spam, bots, pingbacks, and crawlers between three trackers, GWT, and Google analytics, and I'm left with 35 countries coming in on every conceivable device and even logging in at work. (Be careful, some of you might not be aware your work ISPs actually name your companies.)

Ok, down to bizness. I know some of you are facepalming about selfies in a bathroom, but considering how long I went on the webs without posting a single selfie because I'm one of the most reclusive introverts you ever met in your life (I know, really hard to believe now, right?), I think it's pretty cool of me to make you guys think I've overcome that hurdle, just another way I toy with your minds. Plus I was inspired by Jenny Lawson writing about hiding in bathrooms, because I've done that all my life. Click the pic for the book. Click here for her blog.


All my selfie pix will click to original posts.

This is my 'professional' pic at linkedin. It was taken in a bathroom at Mercy hospital in Springfield, Missouri right after I had a 2-day holter put on, and I found out later that while I was taking that pic, I was experiencing bradycardia for the first time in my life after years of SVT and surgical correction, so if I was goofy enough to take this pic just because I thought it was funny, I blame it on poor oxygen delivery to my brain. I think I figured out later I must have accidentally taken my blood pressure pill twice that morning, and no wonder I was so loopy driving into town. And then I thought it would be funny to use a 'stupid day' pic as my professional pic because it truly represents my life so well. This is aspie spoonie executive jetsetter. That and I love mocking professionalism. I can't get through a day without shredding hosiery to save my life. I've retailed professionally. I left that off my linkedin profile. On purpose. Even though I was really good at it. (They called me the Bra Nazi.)

aspie spoonie executive jetsetter

This one was taken at Mercy Fitness in the locker room by the bathroom stalls. I'm not a mirror person, rarely stop to even look at myself, but one of my first experiences as an aspie kid waking up to a sense of objective self was in a department store fitting room with opposite mirrors. This was one of my first pictures coming back out public after years of health fail, this time as a self integrated Pinky, one year before I went completely public on my first Pinky blog. No more private blogging. Ok, there's private blogging, but it's called writing a book now. Everything that's not book material goes public out of my head in real time.


Same fitness center, different day. Actually three months earlier (2012). I was wearing this awesome Lexx t-shirt. I thought this pic was funny enough to put on facebook, and a friend of mine who wrote this book told me I look mean, lol.


Yep, my bathroom again, and this was one of my first public Bluejacky pix in a 2008 post that now resides in my aspienado work blog. It's kind of a big deal since it's right in the heart of about 3 years of really rough health fail and I actually got a decent picture.


This is from a series of photos what wound up becoming my G+ avatar representation. I think they're hilarious because it's so really me and I don't give a crap what people think. My sexuality is ambiguous, partly because I'm allergic to makeup and my hair was still just coming back in, plus I really loved that old shirt. This was taken Thanksgiving day (2012), and I was home alone waiting for my crew to come back from the Turkey Trot. From that point was a jolly little compulsive jaunt into finally setting up a Google account, which now officially verifies all my Lexx stuff. Yes, from a bathroom.


That's right, I've been Lexxing from the bathroom for years. This is from my guest bathroom looking out onto the kitchen way back in 2006, after I received a bunch of autographed stuff from Brian Downey, probably about 6-12 months before the big health fail first started its slow avalanche. If I made this public anywhere I sure can't find it, unless it's in a Lexx related forum somewhere, so this clicks to my pinterest.


Notice I didn't put it in an obvious spot, and it's 3 years old now and still hasn't been liked or repinned. I buried it. Sometimes I tuck things in little pockets of spacetime to see how hard people lurk through my stuff. (My most repinned pin has over 500 repins. My most repinned fandom pin has over 300. My most repinned board overall is Lexx, but it doesn't look that spectacular unless you add up all the repins from over 200 pins.) Anyway, my point is that I successfully buried my most personal fandom photo in plain site (until now), and you never know what you're going to find sitting around in my stuff.


I had a niece who would hide a note or penny behind a picture frame in hotel rooms. My daughter hid little random notes to me throughout empty spirals for me to find later (and dated them) and never told me, and years later I still run into them. *snif* So it's kind of a family thing. We're sneaky people. We say I love you in mysterious ways.

I've got more bathroom selfies, but I think that's probably enough. These handful span about 7 years.

I just want to say thank you. I'm feeling mushy and gooey right now, which has been a rare thing most of my life until stuff really started opening up here on my public blog the last few months.


There IS method to all this madness. I'm very serious saying there is a real Plan. Also, I'm getting lots of help from a Bunny today. It's taken 3 1/2 hours to cobble this together in between very busy girl stuffs.


I'd also like to thank #MondayBlogs and Rachel Thompson who created it and especially Vicki Addesso for dragging me into it until I got a clue. I know I'm terrible to tongue in cheek mock analytics and stuff, but these are rock solid real people coming through that pipeline, and it is definitely appreciated. I try to remember to pin blogs I like onto my 'Blogs I like to read' board, but many of the cooler #MondayBlogs in the feed slip past me, so click that last link for the feed.

Bunny just went down for a nap and I need a brain cleanser so bad. Laterz.


Completely forgot to mention the reason I'm smiling in my twitter avatar is because I'm in a bathroom. (Per a comment, my twitter avatar pic is NOT a mirror pic, omg, plz to not make me asplain why I'm smiling.)



Sorry, I'm back. HAVE to add the Sharknado tee selfie I took in bathroom in a Houston restaurant and loaded to facebook because a person actually snarked me coming in the door as white trash. Hellz YEAH.

3 comments:

  1. So my avatar is in the bathroom too:) Its easier pointing at a mirror, kinda :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yeah, who's isn't? ;)

    I'm not a 'look at me' kind of person. You didn't know me before Pinky. A lot of my lurkers did.

    You probably still don't get the sox thing. It's cool if people don't get the sox.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. By the way, only two of those pix pointed AT the mirror. I stood in bathrooms, I didn't use the mirror to get all the pix.

      Delete